Freddie Mercury imagines

Sail away sweet child

THIS MAN'S EXQUISITE BEAUTY SHALL FOREVER ASTOUND AND SHOCK ME LIKE WHY IS HE SO PERFECT THIS IS NOT EVEN FUNNY I LOVE THIS MAN WITH MY WHOLE HEART AND HE IS LITERALLY THE DEFINITION OF GODLY I MEAN LOOK AT THIS ANGEL

Alright, angst coming up...and more frequent updates because I've finally got ideas which I never do anymore and I'm always the same way with my other stories that would also be a part of it but I am gonna try my best to stop being a lazy bitch lmfao

Trigger warning: Mentions of miscarriage 

1985

You numbly hung onto your husband as he helped you out of the hospital, thankful as ever there weren't any paparazzi lurking around to snap pictures of the moment and plaster it on any tabloids. That was the last thing you needed.

It had been a few days since the 'incident'. You hadn't even saw it coming, you thought everything would be fine. You and Freddie had been over the moon with excitement when you found out you were expecting, and you couldn't wait to be parents to a child you were so ecstatic to raise.

The universe clearly didn't share that joy.

You hadn't been able to stop crying since, you didn't know what had gone wrong but you blamed it entirely on yourself. 

You just couldn't handle it. It was too sudden and horrible. The baby had been perfectly healthy before, so why couldn't it have just made it? Why did it have to go and leave your world so cold? 

It was your fault. You failed your child. You failed Freddie. You failed at what the two of you wanted more than anything.

Once the car parked at garden lodge, Freddie silently picked you up and carried you inside, going upstairs to your bedroom and gently laying you down and tucking you in. You wanted so badly just to curl up and die, you had no strength mentally or physically. You didn't know how you were supposed to keep going.

"C-Can you come here?" You asked hoarsely, your voice weak and shaky from all the weeping and lack of talking.

Freddie nodded mutely, getting in bed with you and pulling you against his chest, careful to avoid his arms getting too close to your stomach. That was a foreign spot to be touched and the both of you knew it.

You sniffled quietly, burying your face in his neck as he rubbed your back and rocked you gently as if expecting you to break down like you had the past few days when you got into this position, but no tears fell and no wails escaped your lips. 

You were really worried about Freddie. You were still heartbroken and vulnerable as ever, but it seemed like Freddie wasn't. It wasn't as if he didn't care about what happened, but he didn't cry or break down like you did. He just held you and did what he could to console you, almost robotically now that you thought about it.

"F-Freddie?" You whispered, earning a strained hum from the Persian who was clearly trying not to look at you which you took note of.

"Ba-sweetie, can you please look at me?" You had just stopped yourself from calling him baby, you called him that often but you knew it wasn't a word that he would take lightly considering what happened. 

You knew couples eventually got over these kinds of things, but you sensed it would be a long time before you did. 

Freddie let out an inaudible noise before obliging your request, looking up at you with pain filled eyes that though in some way it seemed sick, you wished had tears in them. You wanted him to trust you and be emotional with you like you were with him, maybe that was why he wasn't reacting to this.

"I-I know this is something neither of us expected or wanted, and I know that it's going to take a long time before we heal from this and get back to normal. I don't know how you haven't left me so thank you for staying and helping me get through this, but I feel like you're not really letting me do the same for you." You said slowly, trying to be careful as to how you worded your confession as to not say something wrong.

"You're not supposed to." 

His words shocked and confused you, making you look at him questioningly.

"What is that supposed to mean?" You asked, sure your tone wasn't as gentle as the Persian would've liked.

"I-I'm not the one who was carrying it, it wasn't in my womb...y-you're the one who was going to give birth to it y-you have the right to be upset." He rambled, making your puzzled expression morph into one of pain and sadness.

"S-So do you." You squeaked in disbelief.

"Yes, I would've been the one giving birth to it and yes it was me who carried it b-but you helped create it, you were the other half that got it there so you have every single fucking bit of a right to be upset about this as I do." You said fiercely, though you softened at Freddie's whimper and his eyes finally welling up.

"No, let it out." You said softly, grabbing his arm and gently setting it down as he moved to wipe his tears away.

"Don't hide your pain from me anymore honey...No one's forcing you to be the strong one all the time you know." You sighed, your urging finally getting him to his breaking point as he sobbed against your shoulder, letting go of all his anguish as he cried.

You felt your heart aching even more as you hugged him tightly, never wanting to let him go. It was just the two of you again, and you were going to get through this together as long as you were both willing to accept help from one another.

"That's it, I've got you...We'll be okay Freddie, I don't know when but we'll be okay." You swallowed a gulp, slowly starting to believe your words.

The end.