Best Life

Chapter 51

Katie

I clamber back into the SUV but keep the door open, the intoxicating smell of the roses all around me is too beautiful to resist. I smile down at my own roses and brush my fingers over the recent additions.

You don't need to be a genius to know who my pink rose represents. She is the person I admire most in this world and with good reason. She is so full of good grace and joy and sweetness, it practically oozes from her soul. Her influence is immense wherever she goes and people remember her name and her beautiful nature. From the moment I met her, she has had a profound impact on my life. The unknown face of a girl I poured so much hatred towards, ended up being the most important part of my recovery process. Anger and depression turned into acceptance and most importantly, a lifelong friendship. The only setback being my burst eardrum from Sam's fucking squealing when she saw her tattoo rose... crazy girl.

I finally settled on my rose. Initially I didn't want any colour, a representation of the void in my heart when mum and dad passed away. But as time went on, good things started happening again, albeit with a few alarming setbacks. I try not dwell on those dark days and nights, when I felt so exhausted from the fear. Adam was there of course, ready and patiently waiting for me to reach for him. I needed help. A lot of help. I had to learn how to live without the fear and to lean on those special people around me. And he was there for all of it. The highest of highs and the very lowest of lows, he was there with that mesmerising smile and his unwavering love. I remember when I first saw him, at the bar, all that time ago. How I ran and ran, but something magical was at work and the universe kept putting us onto each other's path, until that path became one path. So, my rose is of course... purple. To remind me that an enchanting love is possible, and now that I have it, I'm never letting it go.

His red rose was even easier. For the love he has shown for me and us and our families. The courage to continue to believe in all of the good things that would eventually happen all around him. The deepest respect that he gives to those that show it to him and the people he loves. For the beautiful passionate man he is, both towards his work, his village of friends, his family and his relationship with me. I regularly pinch myself as I often can't believe how lucky I am to have met him and how much he has influenced my life. His belief in us being together, his level head when we discovered who we were to each other, and his resilience when he unintentionally hurt me and his patience when I let my fear take hold of me. He was always watching me, loving me, waiting for me. Just like I'm waiting for him now...

What the actual fuck is he even doing?

Chloe recommended that I should go to the cemetery where my parents and Granny are resting, that it would help with dealing with the trauma of their deaths. So we've been coming here, about once a month, with a fully decked out three course picnic on Sam's fucking insistence. Her and Adam's parents are of course here too, and we spend some time together with all of our loved ones. The first time was incredibly difficult but when I look back, it was also very rewarding and made me feel... a sense of peace. It felt comforting that I had a place to go to grieve, instead of carrying that pain around with me all the time.

I twist around in my seat and see Adam still standing by mum and dad's graves, deep in conversation with Lizzy, with Jax and Sam hovering close by. The talking seems to come to an end with lots of smiles, hugs and tender back slaps shared between all of them. Adam walks casually back to the car and slides into the driver's seat.

"Sam not coming with us?" I ask him with a smile. And why the hell wouldn't I be smiling at this gorgeous man, who is equally grinning his beautiful face at me.

"Lizzy offered to drop her off at Jane's," he replies simply.

I gesture back to where they were all standing about gossiping like school mums, as he throws the car into gear and starts to back out of the car park.

"So... what was all that about...?" I ask him, trying my best to be utterly cool and calm.

He changes gears and drives us forward down the driveway towards the exit, casually putting his giant paw on my thigh, giving me a tingling squeeze.

"Well... I had been talking to your parents. And I had to talk to your sister too," he says vaguely.

"But... why?" His answer doesn't really explain shit... and he knows it. I get the impression he's trying to stretch this out without having to answer questions in too much detail.

But then he smiles that brilliant smile, glancing at me from the corner of his eye, and squeezes my thigh again. Like he was nervous for a fleeting moment and then managed to shake it off and get back to his normal self.

"... Well, I haven't been struck by lightning yet... so I'm assuming that they are happy for me to get down on one knee sometime soon and ask you to be my wife."

And he keeps driving... not acknowledging my jaw that has dropped through the god damn floor.