Ain't Shady Baby, I'm Hot

103

"Did you find them?"

"No."

"Mom. Mom, I'm so sorry." Xena rested her head down on her Mom's forearm. Xena's hands held tight to her Mother's too-pale and too-cold one. "I should have called for backup immediately. I should have gotten her help." She sobbed into the bedding, her lungs and throat tired but she pressed on.

"So they got away?"

"We uh... We lost them. I'm sorry."

"I thought I could save her, I thought that if I went out there and stopped the bleeding-- she'd... she'd be fine. Mom, it's my fault. I let her down. I let him kill her. He's a killer now. But still--I, I'm so confused and I'm lost." Her words grew watery and nearly incomprehensible as she cried out. "I still have to figure out everything out. And, and you got hurt because of me. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

The rain beat the window. One of the only other noises save for Xena.

"You lost them? What do you mean you lost them? Like, they're gone? What are you talking about?"

"They took an open boat into a tropical depression, Pope."

"Mom, I don't know what to do. I shouldn't even be in this situation. I'm still a kid. Mom, I'm sorry I was gone so much. I need you Mom. Please, I--" High pitched beeping filled the room over powering all other sound. Xena rose her head, her mind spinning as she looked at the rapid lines moving on the monitor. The noise echoed, drilling itself into her head as she frantically looked around for the call button.

"So, they're dead?"

"Help! HELP! Please!" Xena shouted with all her might, her right hand slamming on the call button as she never once let go of her mother. She couldn't fathom the thought-- she swore that once she let go of the physical tether, her mother would let go of her physical being.

The door burst open as Roy and Murphy made their way inside, their faces panicked as they stared at the heart monitor then to Xena. Footsteps pounded their way towards the room as the crestfallen faces of Roy and Murphy made their way to Xena.

"We don't know."

The door burst open again as doctors and nurses filled the room, Gray trapped behind them as he tried to follow them but wasn't allowed.

"We need everyone out!" One of the female doctors ordered as Roy and Murphy both grabbed Xena together.

"Mom! Mom! NO!" Murphy's arms were around Xena's waist as she pulled against him. Roy's hands tore Xena's away from her mother. The beeping still shrill and fast. "Let go! Mom!" Murphy and Roy managed to drag the explosive daughter away from her Mom and allow the medical staff to reach the patient.

"You drove them straight through the storm, man! Are you kidding me? Come here!"

"JJ, stop!"

"I'm gonna kill you!"

"Xena, hey, Kiddo." Murphy grunts as he spoke fighting Xena every inch, "You have to stop. You have to stop. They need the room.

"Xena, If they're gonna save her, they need the room. We have to go." Roy whispered as he blocked her view of the bed. The medical staff were calling things out that she barely understood. All she heard was the shrill beep and the attempts to calm her down.

"Hey--hey!"

"I'm gonna kill you, you bastard!"

"Save her. Save her, damnit!" Xena roared as Murphy finally reached the door where Gray could help grab Xena and keep her from the room. Once the door to 555 shut, Xena collapsed on the floor.

Her fists clenched as she threatened to beat the tile until one of the two of them broke. The three knew her too well. Roy jumping in and stopping her raised fist as Gray sat down leaning against the wall and pulled her upper body towards him in a hug.

"He didn't kill no one, and you know it!"

"We're still looking for him, alright?"

"Pope, Pope, just stop. Please, stop."

"She's... She's gotta be okay. She has to be okay." Xena shook as Gray got pulled aside by a doctor while Roy and Murphy took his place. "She's gonna be okay. They'll save her. They have to save her." She was like a broken record as they held her tight.

See, for them, Xena wasn't just some other boxer for their payroll. She was family. Sunshine on a cloudy day but also a hailstorm that could shred someone to pieces. For Roy and Murphy, Xena was becoming closer than blood. She was one of their own now.

"Pope! Pope!"

"I'm sorry! I'm sorry, Dad!"

"She's gonna be okay, Kiddo. Your mother raised a fighter, which means she's one too." Murphy spoke as Xena hands slowly stopped shaking.

"Girlie, there's a reason you are the way you are. Your mama, she's gonna fight until she sees you again. I know it." A quiet sob fell from Xena as she turned and leaned into both of them. Her arms wrapping tightly around her support systems.

For Xena, these two were becoming part of her own family. They were her people, they understood her. They took care of her. They were her uncles that served as a second set of parents. She wanted to convey that. But it was impossible to do so with words. Especially right now.

"It's okay, baby."

"They didn't make it, Mom."

"I know."

"Xena." Gray's voice was a whisper as he held out his good hand for her to take. His eyes watery as he held back a fresh set of tears. Xena set her hand in his and was pulled from the tile floor. Roy and Murphy also stood as the four of them stared at the door where the medical staff had just trickled from.

"It's okay. It's okay."

Xena needed to be brave. For all of them. With a breath in, she set her hand on the door to Room 555 and pushed.

_______•*•*•*•_______

Everyone goes through moments in life that shape them. Changes that occur subtly or drastically. Sometimes its overwhelming luck and good fortune. Others its horrible luck and poor misfortune. Every other time aside from those, its the hanging thread of a choice that makes or breaks a person.

For Xena and this journey of her story, her series of choices began the day she told her mother she was coming with her to Outer Banks. And they continued throughout the year every so often. But in the last two months, Xena has had to choose between a set of options and stick to her gut and fight to come out the winner or the less-loser.

But that's what she does. Like it's been said before. Xena's a fighter. In all senses and tenses possible. It's just who she is.

No matter how far down she's been thrown. No matter how much of a beating she takes.

She'll get back up.

She just needs to find her footing first.