Uncapable

LOVE IS PEACE

My eyes adore you, but it's my soul that fell in love with you.

-From: The Better Man Project

I am in love. I knew that when my heart starts to beat so fast whenever I stole a glimpse of him, my heart would go wild in happiness. The moment I realize I love Ryuji  was a wholesome memory for me.

I've been running from the idea of falling in love with him, but where did it take me? Here, beside him, embracing my feelings with the desire of making him feel how I feel towards him.

I sang my heart out as I decided to admit my feelings for him to myself. That moment, I knew I fall too hard that if he'll break me, the chances of me getting up will go zero.

I fall too hard that it made me so difficult to even  pull up. Kasi miski ako, ayoko ng umalis sa pagkakahulog ko. I knew I would spend my life falling with him again and again.

"Thank you, Celeste" Sambit ni Lala habang nakatingin sa malayong banda kung saan kami naka upo. Nasa mansyon nya kami, sa may garden sa likod, naghihintay kay Ryuji matapos ang paghahanda nya sa surpresa kuno nya sa amin.

Pasko na. And I'm celebrating it with them. My parents on the other hand told me they'll be celebrating christmas abroad, also to attend some business trips there. Wala naman akong magagawa don, kaya tumango nalang ako sa kanila at sinabing mag-ingat sila.

Napatingin ako kay Lala na nasa gilid ko. She was smiling like she was relief about something. "Mas dapat nga po ako mag-thank you sa inyo e." I said as I give back my gaze in front. "You let me celebrate christmas with you. Its really a big thing for me. Kaya thank you po, Lala." I told her, sincerely.

"I am happy that you celebrated it with us, Ija." She look at me and hold my hand and rest it on her lap. "I saw how Ryuji's eyes shine in happiness nang sinabi nya sa akin na magce-celebrate ka ng pasko kasama namin. It was a wholesome moment to see how his eyes glimmer in happiness, Apo." She told, sincerity lingered on her voice.

Napakagat ako sa pang ibabang labi ko dahil sa mga sinabi na Lala.

"You made him so happy. Kaya I am so thankful of you. Thank you, Celeste" A tear escaped her eyes.

I hold back her hands and stared at it. Her palms are warm and its warmness made me feel at ease. Made me feel at home.

"Ryuji made me so happy, too, Lala" I uttered. "Thank you, for taking care of him. Thank you po talaga." I said as my eyes started to pool its tears.

I never imagined I would say these things. Thinking of how different my life now from before, it made me smile and it warmed my heart. I used to have everything in gray– things for me are always in between. Because I never feel certain about something.

But I was certain when Ryuji came. Certain that I know he'll have me captivated and I would gladly let him make me his captive.

Sa kanya lang ako sigurado, e.

"Let's go, ladies! Surprise is ready!" Napatingin kami kay Ryuji na masayang lumabas mula sa loob ng bahay, may ngiti sa labi nya at bakas sa mukha ang saya nya.

"Are you guys crying? Anong nangyari?" Napansin nya ata ang mamasa masang pisngi namin ni Lala.

"No, dear apo. Napaiyak lang ako sa tawa, kanina ko pa kinikwento ang kabulastugan mo nang bata kapa." Anang Lala Aren, sinamahan nya pa ito ng tawa.

"Lala. . ." May bahin ng hiya ang pagsambit nya nito. Tumawa lang si Lala at nagsimula ng pumasok sa bahay.

Lumapit si Ryuji sa akin, may hiya parin ang mukha, napatawa tuloy ako. "Siniraan siguro ako ni Lala, no?" He pouted. Tinawanan ko lang sya at inayang pumasok na.