Oceanside

Chapter 26

Odette

Three weeks pass slower than any other period in my life.

The first week I was in full blown panic mode. I packed and unpacked my things constantly. I spent most of the days checking to see if he was out there, or any of the other wolves. I was convinced that no one I came into contact with was safe. Silas talked of vampires and werewolves like they were an everyday occurrence. With the creatures I ran from so close and under my nose this entire time I was back to feeling paranoid all the time. The feeling made me want to bolt. I hated it. I didn't want to be scared at every sound in the woods or every person I encountered.

A few things stopped me from leaving. One, I didn't know where to go. I thought this area was secluded and far away from what I ran from. I was wrong. Two, I was scared that if I did run into anything on the way out I would get hurt. And three, though I wanted to cut the feeling out at first, leaving would make Silas a permanent fixture in my past. I would have to disappear like before.

That week was the hardest. I hardly slept, scared of every noise that rattled near the cottage. I didn't go into the town either, terrified I would run into one of the creatures.

The second week I was able to get my wits together a bit more. I was still terrified of my surroundings but I slept and was able to keep down more of my food. I also could stand outside for a longer period of time to do basic chores without the urge to run back in. I still haven't gone out at night yet. I spent most of that week thinking over what Silas had said, trying to make sense of how I could miss this. I rethought every encounter trying to find slip ups.

In truth there were none, and at first that scared me. He had been so good at covering any proof that he wasn't human. He acted like the perfect gentleman while being something else completely. Fear turned into confusion; how could he be this monster while still being the way he was with me? I had seen how bad he could really get when he tore apart that wolf in the woods. And yet the next day when he found me he was the complete opposite. I couldn't make sense of it.

Then the third week came and I continued to wonder about him but with a different emotion. As I was able to process what happened and inspect his behavior I found both flaws and things I had to give him credit for. The biggest flaw was that he lied to me. Not only about what he was but I was sure he lied about what he did for a living. He said he was going to train new guards that day and he was fighting that wolf instead. There had to be more he lied about. I wondered how much of his words strayed from the truth.

Then I had to credit him for how he acted around me. For being what he was he was kind and gentle. Thinking back on our dates and the time we spent together he was always making sure I was comfortable. Things I took for nervousness I now saw as hesitancy; he didn't want me to be afraid of him. Something he said a lot as I ran from him. I also had to take into account the wolf in the woods but for another reason. Silas had saved me.

As scary as it had been he was right, the wolf was going to kill me and he stopped him. Then as I ran for my life Silas didn't chase me, he waited till he was human to approach me. That definitely deserved credit.

Now as the fourth week started to pass me my emotions were flipped. I was at first more scared of him than confused, now it was the opposite. And truly, confusion had turned into intrigue and longing. As much as I was scared that he was part of whatever happened in Louisiana I couldn't help but want to know more. I wanted to finally know the truth about exactly what they were.

And I missed him.

I was certain if I saw him now I still wouldn't be ready. In fact it might spark another freak out but the feeling was there. Silas had become a constant in my life and now that was gone. Though I couldn't fix that I tried to satisfy my curiosity.