Oceanside

Chapter 29

Silas

"Silas," A sweet voice spoke lowly.

I didn't open my eyes. I knew that voice from anywhere. It was Odette, my sweet human mate. This time her voice sounded real, as if she was really in the room with me. And that is why I wouldn't open my eyes. I didn't want to open them and have reality remind me she wasn't here. She was miles away and didn't want to be anywhere near me.

"Silas." She sounded closer. I tried to fall back into a deeper sleep. Maybe I would see her face.

I felt something poke my chest lightly. "Silas," she called out again. Then as her small hand laid flat against my shoulder I remembered something completely different. Last night I was supposed to shift. I couldn't and blindly ran through the woods...to Odettes. Which means this isn't a dream.

My eyes opened to see her worried face leaning over me. Her blonde hair draped down like a curtain. As our eyes met she leaned back, caught off guard by my sudden consciousness.

"Hi," she said shyly. Her eyes darted to the small window then back to mine. "Sorry to wake you but you've been sleeping for a while. It's close to dinner time and I was worried."

She was worried about me? That gave me more hope than might be deemed healthy.

"That's alright," I said. I pushed up so I could sit on the bed. I noticed she was dressed for the day but left her hair in its natural state. "Did you eat already?"

With my movement I could feel how sore my body was. It was almost as if I had shifted. Everything ached but it wasn't bad enough to make me wince. One big difference though was my heart. It didn't feel any pain right now. Odette was here in front of me, not crying or asking me to go away. Not yet anyway but I was taking what I could get.

She nodded. "Breakfast and lunch. I wanted to wake you but I figured you might need the rest after last night..." She faded off then with some hesitancy, "Silas what was that? What happened to you?"

This time I could be completely honest. I should have been happy I could but I wasn't entirely. I didn't want to scare her again.

I chose honesty with caution. "Last night I was supposed to shift." I eyed her carefully. She didn't react to the word. "For some reason I couldn't. I wasn't in the right headspace to make the decision but I came here. I had a thought that being here would make me feel better." And I was right. "I am so sorry if that scared you. I didn't mean it to and I know I shouldn't have come."

While I was relieved to see her and did feel better it wasn't fair of me to do it. Trey was right that I wasn't in control enough but I couldn't think straight. I would have tried to put some blame on him if he had the slimmest of chance of stopping me. But I couldn't. It was all me and it wasn't fair to her. I promised myself I would give her time and space. That I wouldn't show up again until she wanted me to. This certainly wasn't keeping that promise.

"It did scare me," she admitted. I wanted to flinch. "But it wasn't the same as back at the house. I was scared for you. Are you okay now?"

I didn't want her to feel that. I never wanted her to feel scared in anyway but I will admit it made me a bit happy to know she was. In a twisted way it told me she still cared.

I nodded. "Yes."

She eyed me as if she didn't believe me. I suppose it was a half lie. I was sore but I was more worried about what was coming next. Would she make me leave? Did this change anything?

"I'm sore that's all," I clarified. "It's nothing that won't fade in a few hours, probably less." That won't be the same if we separate again.

"Are you hungry? All I really have is sandwich stuff."