Oceanside

Chapter 11

Odette

As the month dwindles to an end things become increasingly clearer to me. I liked Silas, and I mean really liked him. It scared me.

Silas was everything I was looking for in a boyfriend and more. He was sweet and caring. He genuinely listened to me and seemed to do a lot to ensure I felt safe with him. Agreeing when I wanted to stay in town or asking if I was comfortable going to another location. He made me smile and laugh. He made my stomach flutter and goosebumps rise on my skin when he touched me. He brought back a lot of parts of me that were shoved down in fear. And man did that feel good.

That was a big part of it. I felt good when I was around him. Happy and carefree. No nerves, no second guessing, no tingles up my spine at the thought of danger. I never felt like that with him.

This is why it was scary; I hadn't ever felt this way before. Sure I considered the fact that my last boyfriend was in high school and I wasn't hiding from a wolfman, but even then it was different. The strength of my emotions were different, intense. I was worried what that meant.

The future was something I used to look at through rose-colored glasses. I had a million trips I wanted to take and some ideas about what I wanted to do. Never anything definite, but I knew what I wanted it to look like. I wanted to live in a beautiful place with people I loved. To experience life as fully as I could. But since that night in the swamps I could hardly see my future. It was as if I was looking through a dark tunnel. There was a tiny dot of light. Something to look forward to but no definite time of when I'll reach it. Or if I'll reach it.

I realized that night just how quickly things change. My life had been turned upside down, shaken out of the box I tried to neatly pack it into. My future didn't look much better. I was living day to day, hoping with everything I had that the wolfman wouldn't find me.

But with Silas now in the picture I wondered how much longer I could live like this. I wasn't sure how to explain it all to him. He'd surely think I was insane. And what if that drove him away? Things were still relatively new and I liked where this was heading. I was scared to lose it. Scared to have it too.

Uncertainty was a constant fixture in my gut now. It twisted at the thoughts rattling in my head. I tried to shake it off, focusing all my attention on my hair.

I shouldn't be thinking about any of this now. It would only make me anxious. Fortunately I knew it would fade soon. Silas, as intimidating as he looked, had a way of making that tangled ball disappear from my stomach.

Tonight I was set to meet him at our usual spot in town so he could pick me up for a date. Although this one was different, it was a double date. He had told me two weeks ago about his friend Trey and his girlfriend Natalie. Trey and him had met in the miliary and been friends ever since. I expressed my desire to meet him one day and here we were.

Meeting Silas's friends was just another part of who he was. I knew that from my own. Although I hadn't contacted my friends in close to a year now. I felt terrible about it, and strange too. I had no real friends for Silas to meet. I told him they were all back in Louisiana but even if they were closer I couldn't go see them. It was too risky. The thought made me sad.

I finished braiding my hair, securing it with a small hair tie. I hurried to clip on my silver necklace, pushing my earrings through my ears and slipping on my rings. I grabbed my bag then hurried out the door.

The slight breeze blew my light green dress. It reached my shoes, brushing the tops of my sandals as I walked. The V neckline showcases my necklace but the wide spaghetti straps hid my scars. They were still healing and I waited every day for the evidence of that night to fade.