stars will fall - byler

.17

i led mike through the wooded area behind the trailer park. i forced him to close his eyes as i dragged him by his hand.
-"can i open now? i'm going to trip on something." he complained
-"no." i pulled in his hand harshly to make him catch up with me.
once we got to a certain point in the woods, i stood behind him and pressed my hands against his shoulders.
-"you can open now."
he opened his eyes and was facing the waterfall of the eno river and a few feet in front of us was a picnic i had set up.
-"you did this? that's so sweet." he beamed as he began to walk towards the blanket.
-"yeah, it was no problem." i chuckled as we sat down and he immediately started digging through the basket.
-"sweet! you got M&Ms."
i giggled as i watched him get excited about all his favorite foods.
-"what's this for?" he chuckled.
-"i just wanted to show you how much i appreciate you." i shrugged. he smirked as he leaned over the basket to give me a kiss.
-"you're truly the best." he whispered as his lips hovered mine. i shyly smiled and rubbed the back of my neck nervously as he leaned back and started pulling stuff from the basket.

i laid on my stomach while drawing in my sketchbook after i was done eating. mike was sitting across from me stuffing his face with food.
-"where did you get this pizza?" he asked with a mouthful.
-"domino's." i responded while focused on my drawing. mike brushed his hands together and laid down next to me, wrapping one arm over my back.
-"what are you drawing?" he whispered in my ear, tickling my neck. i giggled and nudged the paper closer to him.
-"the waterfall." i pointed in front of us at the water.
-"it's beautiful. do you come here often?" he asked while taking a grape and shoving it in his mouth.
-"i come here all the time. there's a little path across the river that i made so i can go back and forth." i mentioned.
-"really?"
-"yeah, wanna see?" i sat up and held my hand out. he took it and i began walking him up the small hill behind the waterfall. we walked down to the rocky part of the water and i showed him the rock path i created. the rapidly moving water slapped the rocks, causing splashes to the surface. i let go of his hand and began to step on the rocks.
-"uh, are you sure that's stable?" he called out over the loud water.
-"yes!"
-"just be careful, the-"
-"shit!" i screamed as the rock below me shook from the water. i quickly jumped onto the other rock before it fell. i looked over and laughed at the worried look on mikes face.
-"come on!" i encouraged.
he hesitantly started walking on the rocks and caught up with me. i grabbed his hand and we walked across together.
-"i don't like the idea of you coming out here alone. you could get hurt."
-"it's fine!" i shook off as we reached the ground again. i looked up and saw the huge fallen tree that hovered above the water. i looked back and fourth between him and the tree and a look of realization came over his face.
-"no."
-"yes!"

i climbed up the hill and slowly climbed out in the middle of the trunk. his hand squeezed mine tightly as we sat down.
-"you can see everything from up here. isn't it amazing?" i admired before i saw the fearful look on his face.
-"what's wrong?"
-"nothing, i just don't like heights." he mumbled.
-"i'm sorry.. i didn't know. we can go down." i rambled apologetically.
-"no, no. just.." he leaned in close and clung to me tightly. i smiled and wrapped my arms around him to make him feel more comforted. i looked down at his face and saw him closing his eyes. i tried to think of something to say to distract him.
-"so, how are you and el?"
after saying it out loud i immediately regretted it.
-"oh.. i don't know. the same, i guess." he mumbled.
-"oh."
-"how are you and troy?" he looked up at me.

-"will?"

-"will??"

-"will.." troy moaned in my ear as he tugged at my shirt. he started kissing my lips again as his hands slipped up my shirt and lightly pressed against my stomach.
-"i want you..  i want to do it." he mumbled in my ear while holding me close, running his hands against my back under my shirt. he began kissing my lips again but when he began to take my shirt off, i stopped kissing him.
-"troy.. i'm not ready for that." i whispered and saw the disappointment on his face. he scoffed and scooted away from me, running his fingers through his hair.
-"i'm sorry." i mumbled from behind him.
-"no, just stop, will." he snapped and stood up from his bed. i watched as he walked across his bedroom while running his hands down his face.
-"are you playing with me or something? because one minute you're all over me and the next you're suddenly not ready?" he snarled.
-"what? no."
-"are you just not into me anymore?" he accused.
-"no! why do you think that?" i stood up from the bed to face him.
-"because if you were really that into me you'd have sex with me. so i guess you're not."
i didn't know what to say in this moment. he was right, i'm not that into him anymore. but i wasn't sure if ending things was the right decision.
-"will.. these past 2 months have been great. i think i love you."
i was shocked by those 3 words. i haven't heard them in forever and it was weird to hear it from him.
-"don't you love me?"
of course i didn't love him. i loved mike.. mike and i have been seeing each other behind troy and els back. but i don't know how serious it is between us.. i don't even know if mike loves me. mike and el still do things together.. so should i?
but i couldn't tell him all of that.
-"of course i do." i lied.
-"good. then let me do it.. i promise you'll like it."