The only boy I can't have

Eleanor

My week had been one from hell.

I mean don't get me wrong I had experienced way worse ones but the dreaded thought of my brother who had always been there for me, hating me forever because I was with his best friend was looming over me.

Awakening from my 3 hour nap, my phone buzzed next to me.

JACOB ❤️🙄 - can we talk? At home in 20?
Sent 09:41pm

I squealed jumping up onto Luke's bed, Kyle ran in, with his arms ready to karate chop any intruders.

He shrivelled into the wall when he saw I was looking at my phone.

"Sorry Kyle! Jacob messaged me he wants to meet" I squealed

Kyle who was very much aware of the entire situation, squealed with me, jumping up onto the bed jumping up and down.

The door swung open "what the fuck is going on!" Luke half yelled half laughed.

I threw myself at him, he caught me in his arms.

"OMG OMG Luke you are never going to believe it! Jacob messaged me - he wants to meet!"

"That's great beautiful! I'll drop you now" he kissed my forehead spinning me around.

My stomach grumbled with nerves as I climbed into Luke's truck.

******

"Good luck baby" he kissed me on the cheek before driving off.

Why did I feel so out of place outside my own home?

Why did I feel like I was going to be sick when I was just talking to my brother?

The world had been tipped upside down and shaken around.

My shaking hand reached for the door handle, as it opened. I looked up at Jacob who's face was emotionless. But I knew him better than that. He had a million feelings and thoughts swirling round his head.

Jacob ran a hand through his hair before stepping to the side, hand signalling for me to come in.

I was so happy to be home.

Lola jumped on me with excitement "babe!! Omg it has been hell without you." Jacob coughed and she went red "ah yes - leaving now" she winked at me and narrowed her eyes at Jacob.

Shuffling awkwardly over to the couch, I sat on the edge, whilst Jacob sat next to me, expecting him to start the conversation, I said nothing.

After 5 minutes of silence Jacob cleared his throat.

"I'm going to talk and you are going to listen - okay?"

I nodded avoiding his eye contact.

The guilt that swirled around in the pit of my stomach was unbearable.

He sighed. "I love you Eleanor you know that. But you fucking betrayed me. In possibly the worst way you could."

"I mean seriously? Luke? I mean firstly he is a major douche when it comes to girls. But also he is my best friend. His family are our family's best friends. He isn't some random guy you can just dump because you aren't feeling it anymore - if you date him it affects all of us. If you break up with him it affects us all even more."

"I know that Jacob do you not -" he cut me off.

"Let me finish. As I said to Luke" he spoke to Luke? When? Before me? "I've been thinking a lot this week and I can't tell you what to do with your life or who to love. It's not my place."