Prelude to kisses

Chapter 28

Lee hadn't slept a wink in the last few days. It seemed he was always on the road, attending meetings and seminars and seeing patience, once in the last three days he got a house call in the middle of the night. Even with all that he couldn't close his eyes even for a second. He felt too tired to think, he felt haunted by the ghost of that girl. That's how she had seemed when he laid eyes on her. He wished he hadn't looked up in that very moment, he wished he hadn't left his office door open, so he didn't have to see her leaving the building. Her office was opposite his and he hadn't seen her for five days until yesterday. He wondered if the lawyer she worked for had hired someone else while she was gone without letting her know.

He was never one to sit on the other side of the table, close to the door where you could see everyone that entered and left the building but yesterday, for some reason her had. Lee had sat on the chair close to the door having a conversation with Blessing and Linnette. He had looked up just in time to catch sight of two girls leaving the room opposite. The first one leaving was taller, chirpier as she took out her phone from the back of her jean pockets while the other one looked like life had been sucked out of her. They made eyes contact and a part of Lee broke apart to find so much burden there. It was like looking into the mirror six months ago, it was like looking at himself. Going back in time to find a lost, lonely man who didn't know what to do with himself.

He raised his hand in a wave and just like that she came to him. Like that's all she's been in need of today. Like that made her want to go on again. She didn't say a word, just let herself inside his office and took the seat next to him. She sat down with her legs sprawled on the floor and her head handing from the chair. She stayed like that for a while and even when she seemed better, she still didn't move from her position.

After a while she gave him a small smile of reassurance. It doesn't ease the worry from him, it hadn't made it any better that she's at least managed to smile. Rather it made him worry a lot more. What was he to do with her now? He took her home later on, she lived in those nice buildings, affordable but very neat. She spoke about how she wanted something like that someday. She spoke about things with so much passion and love, Lee felt assured that she wouldn't do anything to harm herself. She was still so much in awe with life and as he watched her enter the building, he knew she'd pull through. That whatever she was going through would probably only be one chapter in her book.

He hadn't known then that this young girl would cling onto him for dear life for the years to come. When he took her home two days in a row after that he hadn't imagined just how much both their lives would change. Lee was like that; he wouldn't know what hit him even if it hit him right in the face and fell right on his feet. It was probably one of the reasons his relationship ended. Most part of him didn't want to admit that Jackie, would be staying in his life for a long time, that she'd come to be someone he wanted to protect so strongly.

He wanted to shield her from all the bad in the world, even when she seemed to throw herself right into the lion's den. She seemed to enjoy it, she seemed to think she could take more of the pain because she'd already taken so much, it was almost as if she was addicted to it. Lee didn't understand it, but he still loved her, she became like a little sister to him as the years went by. And sometimes he found himself drowning himself in alcohol, just to feel some of the things she felt, just so he could understand why she did what she did.

Like right now, they're at his friend's party. It's New Year's Eve and he had been invited by a friend of his to his house. He hadn't meant to be here, he had meant to be home, maybe visit his parents. Something, anything but this. But Jackie had insisted, she'd needed some fresh air. She'd pleaded with him. With a sigh he had picked her up later into the day and drove them to the party. Now here they were, an hour later after their arrival and she was already drunk. She was so drunk he had to follow her around to make sure she didn't pass out somewhere. She was laughing hysterically, sitting on some guy's lap. He was making the best of his time by chatting with his high school friend. She was telling him about her plans to go to Thailand to teach English.

"The pay is pretty good, and Thailand is a beautiful country, I think I'm going to take it".

"I'm happy for you", he told her honestly.

"I'm proud of you, you know. What you're doing for people, it's amazing".

"I do what I can".

She noticed his attention was constantly on Jackie when she finally asked, "You know her?"

"Yeah, she's a friend".

"She seems to be having fun".

"Yeah, that's kind of the reason why I'm here".

She looked at him for a long while before she asked, "You like her?"

He was appalled by the question at first but took a second to think about it. To him she was like a little sister because she was four years younger than he was, she considered him her friend. It didn't seem too farfetched for someone outside their relationship to think that they were dating. She wasn't too young for them to date, and both weren't in a relationship. "No, she's like a little sister".

"She's not that young though".

"Yeah, but it's kind of hard to see her as anything more than that".

The conversation ended and moved to other things. They waited until they were thirty minutes into the new year when he drove her home. She slept throughout the entire drive home, purring like a cat on the passenger seat. When he helped her into bed, he realized she clutched her stomach as if she was in pain. He stayed until it seemed the pain had started to dissipate. He was about to get up from the bed when she held his hand, pulling him close to her and kissed him.

Her lips were soft, warm and tender. It was easy to lean into that familiar feeling of warm lips against his, a feeling he'd almost forgotten, a feeling he hadn't felt in too long, but his eyes were wide open, and she was Jackie. She was like a little sister to him; she was a friend and nothing more. When he was outside the building he smiled as he looked up at her floor. It was clear as day; he hadn't had an ounce of romantic feeling for her. That was reassuring as hell.