Prelude to kisses

Chapter 33

Jackie Tanaka groaned and shifted uncomfortably. The pain grew unbearable. Last night she'd tried exercises to ease the lower back pain but today it hit her full force. She was shaking at this point, sweating with a high fever. She couldn't get out of bed, the only thing she'd been able to do was call Mahita. She'd almost called Lee, he'd know what to do than Mahita, but he was packing and would be getting on a plane in a few hours. Her heart ached, she wanted to force her body to get up from this bed and get to his place and say goodbye to him, but she just couldn't. It just wasn't impossible with what she was feeling.

She had a meeting tomorrow too, she prayed she'd wake up feeling better tomorrow to attend the meeting and take Lee to the airport. It was twelve in the afternoon, Mahita had to get her son from school before she gets to her. She felt a wave of feelings hit her again, multiplying the pain, it shot right up her stomach she thought she was breaking in half.

She was so lonely, always so lonely even if she had people that cared. She was lonely but also a burden to the ones that were there for her. She was openly crying now, she didn't hear the front door open and close, only realized a moment later being pulled into an embrace. It was warm, with a coconutty scent, it reminded her of the beach, a faraway scent. Faraway memories, you could barely feel them, you just knew they were there. That's how Mahita was, her presence wasn't overly in your face, she was just there, you kind of just knew she was there, and you could grab onto her whenever you needed her.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry", She sobbed into Mahita's chest.

Mahita just held her, she knew Jackie had a tendency to apologize for things that she wasn't to blame for and even if she wasn't to blame, she found a way to blame herself. There were no words to be said at a time like this, holding her was enough, it said enough.

"Take this", she told her, putting two tablets in her palms before handing her a glass of water.

"I thought I could endure it without taking anything and got mad when I realized I couldn't".

"You've been working nonstop for the past five years, your body can only take so much", she told the other woman.

"It feels like that's all I have".

"Go to sleep, Marvin is watching tv. I will clean around the apartment and make you something to eat okay", she told her

"Thank you".

Marvin had fallen asleep on the couch, his homework book left open on his lap. She picked it up and closed it, putting it on the table. She made vegetable soup and platted it with bread. Marvin was already up by the time she was done but Jackie was still sound asleep. They had dinner alone and finished Marvin's homework before watching a few movies. Jackie was still sound asleep, she barely stirred, just purred like a cat.

"Mommy, are we sleeping here tonight? Can we?"

"Go put on your pajamas, I will be there in a minute to tuck you in", She told her son.

Mahita helped her son with brushing his teeth and washed his face before tucking him into bed. "I don't like the bedding, it's too pink". Mahita laughed before changing it and putting away Chloe's bedding.

She settled in Laura's room, the bed was untouched, only a flowery scent lingered on the sheets. Laura hadn't visited in months; she was studying medicine after working as a nurse for almost three years. Jackie must feel lonely and homesick missing the people she loved the most. She hadn't taken a leave since they'd known each other. After that first meeting and a few meetings for coffee and dinner, they both realized there could be something more to their relationship.

They both gave in the friendship, and they were there for each other. It felt like her life had become a roller-coaster since they'd met, more work, more clients and sometimes less time with her son, but she wouldn't change it for the world. It gave Marvin the time to spend with his friends and learn more about what he loved to do. She smiled at the thought of her son. He'd currently fallen in love with public speaking, flowers and plants forgotten. She missed that about being young, you could be one thing today and another tomorrow. She wanted to be that ground for him to fall back on whenever he got lost. It was all she could do as a mother to a son that was a separate being from her.

Thinking about Marvin growing up and going out into the world as his own made her heart ache. She was a mother bird, teaching her son to fly knowing one day he would fly far away from her and be his own person. She was training him to be without her, she could only hope he'd still find his way back to her when he wanted. That he'd always know he is loved and always will be loved.