Rishab: I have a plan.
Kul: Does it end with us not getting into any trouble?
Rishab: I said I have a plan, not a miracle.
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Virat: Date someone who will drag you outside at 3 am to look at the stars.
Rohit, glaring at Virat: If anyone, and I mean, anyone, wakes me up at 3 am to go look at the damn sky, I will immediately remove them from my life.
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Teacher: What inspired you to write this essay?
Ishan: The due date.
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Rishab, lying in hospital bed: You call it near death experience.
Rishab: I call it vibe check from god.
*Virat and Jaddu trying to hold back an angry Rohit *
Rohit: Let me go. I need to kill that idiot for all the stress he gave me.
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Yuzi: Screw lactose intolerance! I will consume as much dairy as I want!
2 hours later-
Yuzi, crying on the floor: WHY DOES IT HURT SO MUCH?!
Kul, sighs: *dialing 911*
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Hardik: I hate how you're just born out of nowhere, and you're forced to go to school and get education so you can get a job. What if I wanted to be a duck? No one ever asked me if I want to be a duck!
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Shreyas: You need to find a hobby
Subh: I do have a hobby
Shreyas, exasperated: Looking at Ishan's ass isn't a hobby!
Subh: Right, it's a job and I excel at it.
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Rohit, making his 12th coffee: This is going to fix everything.
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Ishan: Bhaiya, is 10 a lot?
Hardik: Depends on the context. Dollar? No. Bodies? Yes.
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Virat: Why is Hardik crying on the bathroom floor?
Jassi: He's drunk.
Virat: ... Okay?
Jassi: And he heard Rahul is engaged.
Virat: But he is engaged to Rahul?
Jassi, sighing: Yeah, he forgot that part.
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Interviewer: So, tell us, Mr. Kholi, why should we hire you?
Virat: No.
Interviewer: Wha-
Virat: The question is why should I let you hire me?
Interviewer, under his breath: Ooo, can he do that?
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Jaddu: I'm so tired of this life. I want to be a roomba. I want knives taped to me. And I want to be set loose.
_______________《~~~~~~》______________
Virat: Name something you believed in as a child that you no longer do as an adult.
Rahul: Myself.
Virat: Baccha, No-
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Rishab: *sleeping*
Shreyas, looking at him fondly: I love him so much, he's my everything and I'll give him the worl-
Rishab: *starts snoring*
Shreyas: I want divorce.
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Virat: Rohit, will you get something from my back pocket?
Rohit: What am I going to get out of this?
Virat: A chance to touch my ass?
Rohit: .....
Rohit: Deal.
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Hardik: Sometimes I don't realize an event was traumatic until I tell it as a funny story and notice everyone is staring at me weirdly.
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Mahi: So, how did the blood donation go?
Jaddu: worst experience ever. I'm not doing that again.
Mahi: Why? What happened?
Jaddu: They asked me too many stupid questions.
Jaddu: Whose blood is it?
Jaddu: Where did you get it from?
Jaddu: Why is the blood in two buckets?
Jaddu: Who even asks this many questions? You wanted blood, I am giving it to you. Just take it without any questions.
ICT: .......
Mahi: JADDU, WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK DID YOU DO???
_______________《~~~~~~》______________
Virat, after pitching an idea-
Virat: So, what do you think? Good idea, right?
Aswin: Whatever floats your Titanic.
Virat: .....
Virat: but Titanic sank.
Aswin: Yeah, just like your IQ did when you came up with that idea.
_______________《~~~~~~》______________
Interviewer: So, in which state do you live?
Rohit: The panic state.
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Someone: You look so tired.
Mahi, sipping vodka: Well, the torment is relentless, and the horrors never cease.
_______________《~~~~~~》______________
Hardik: If you had to choose between me and your life, who would you choose?
Rahul: My life.
Hardik: ...Oh.
Rahul: Because you're my life, sunshine.
Hardik, blushing: oh.
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*phew*
See you in next one~!
