Virat: What is it called when you kill a friend?
Rahul: Homicide.
Jas : Murder.
Hardik: Homiecide
————–––———————
Hardik: They don’t make them like me no more. I’m the last of my kind.
Jassi : Thank god.
—————–––———————
Virat: can I ask how exactly does one accidentally set a lemon on fire?
Hardik: Microwave for 40 minutes.
Rohit: WHY WERE YOU MICROWAVING A LEMON?!
Hardik: I read boiling lemons helps cover up bad smells and I wanted to cover up the scent of burnt oranges, but I didn’t own any pots…
Rahul: Did you burn an orange too? HOW?!
Hardik: Microwave for 40 minutes.
————–––———————
Rohit: Why are you late? Where's Hardik?
Rahul ( sighing): Hardik and I were crossing the street, and this man drove by and honked at us.
Virat ( sighing): What did he do?
Rahul: hardik chased him to the next red light, and reached into his window, and-
Hardik: *walking in* Who wants a steering wheel?
————–––———————
Virat : So, what's for dinner?
Rohit, staring at the food he burnt: Regret
————–––———————
Hardik: If we’re in trouble, just throw Rahul at the problem, and hope for the best.
————–––———————
Rahul: Is something burning?
Hardik, leaning seductively on the counter: Just my desire for you.
Rahul: hardik, the toaster is literally on fire.
————–––———————
Hardik open his mouth to speak -
Rahul: New challenge! Don't say stupid shit for 24 hours!
————–––———————
Hardik: Oh my Rahul.
Rohit: Don't you mean 'oh my god'?
Hardik: You worship your god, I'll worship mine.
[ virat chokes on water]
————–––———————
*talking on the phone*
Rohit: Remember how I said that virat and I were gonna have a calm night out for once?
Mahi: Yeah…
Rohit: Well, we’re in jail.
Mahi: *hangs up*
————–––———————
Virat: I can't take this anymore, someone needs to take me out!
Rohit: In a dating type of way, or an assassination type of way?
Virat: I don't know, surprise me!
————–––———————
Virat: Hardik once told me that brown is just navy orange, and I have never been more disappointed with something I agree with.
————–––———————
Rohit, driving jassi and Hardik : So how was your day?
Hardik: We almost got surprise adopted!
Rohit: What?
Jassi : We almost got kidnapped.
Rohit: Oh, okay.
Rohit: *slams on the breaks* WAIT WHAT?!
————–––———————
Rohit : Is stabbing someone immoral?
Virat: Not if they consent to it.
Mahi : Depends who you’re stabbing.
Jaddu : YES?!?
————–––———————
Rohit: Isn’t it weird that we pay money to see other people?
Virat: Plane tickets?
Rahul: Concert tickets?
Hardik: Prostitution?
Rohit, holding their broken frames: Glasses.
————–––———————
Rohit: *Screams*
Virat: *Screams louder to establish dominance*
Jaddu : Should we do something?
Mahi: No, I want to see who wins.
————–––———————
Rohit: You lying, cheating, piece of shit!
Virat: Oh yeah? You’re the idiot who thinks you can get away with everything you do. WELCOME TO THE REAL WORLD
Rohit: I’m leaving you, and I’M TAKING JASSI WITH ME!
Mahi, picking up the monopoly board: I think we’re gonna stop playing now.
————–––———————
Hey everyone!
This is your author, here, peeking out from behind the scenes.
I hope you enjoyed these hilarious (and maybe slightly out-of-character) incorrect quotes with the cricket squad.
This is my first time writing a book, so I'm kinda nervous. If you're enjoying the content, please vote, leave a comment and let me know!
Happy reading! And stay tuned for the next dose of chaos!
