Coming Out - An Emon Fanfic

Chapter 21 - Advice

Simon cried into Vikk's shoulder as Josh stood watching with his arms crossed. "Simon, you have to fix this." He said after Simon finally stopped crying. "I know." He quietly said, his voice parched from crying. Vikk patted his shoulder encouragingly as Josh walked out, the two following behind.

"Ethan?" Simon quietly said as he moved closer to the bed. Ethan opened his eyes which were red from tears. As soon as he saw Simon the tears started running down his face. Simon sat on the edge of the bed as he wiped away Ethan's tears. "I'm so sorry Ethan." He whispered. "I lost control. Nothing can make up for the monster I was today, but I love you, and if I could do anything, anything to take all that pain back, I would. I will. I love you so much Ethan." He slowly said as he broke into tears.

Ethan shook his head, unable to speak as he slowly reached up and wiped away Simon's tears. He cracked a small smile, showing Simon he was ok. Simon held Ethan's hand tightly as he leaned down and kissed Ethan's forehead. "We're gonna fix this." He assured Ethan, who nodded.

They sat in silence, holding each other's hands and soon Ethan fell asleep. Simon carried on holding onto him staring at Ethan's face. There were small cuts all over his face, but he was still beautiful. Simon's eyes slowly moved down Ethan's arm as tears appeared. His arm was covered with plasters. Simon counted them as tears flooded his eyes, 11 cuts. His boyfriend had managed to cut himself 11 times while he was downstairs, huffing and puffing. What kind of boyfriend was he?

Simon started to feel sick again and ran out of the room. He got to the bathroom and vomited again, but this time there was no one to help him. Josh and Vikk had gone back to the Sidemen house and Ethan's parents were doing a whole load of paperwork with the police.

Simon stood in the bathroom, crying. He had vomited, but he still felt sick - sick of himself. He was disgusted with what he had done. Nothing would be the same again, Ethan wouldn't love him like before and his parents hated him for what happened to their son. Simon had already lost his friends, there was no one left except for his own family.

He went into a cubicle and sat down on the toilet lid with his phone in his hand. He swiped down his contact list, seeing the names that hated him, until he finally reached the name that had always loved him - mum. He called it and lifted the phone to his ear, leaning on his elbow and massaging his head.

"Hello?" Simon heard from the other side, his voice immediately broke.

"Hi mum."

"Hey Simon! It's been so long since I've spoken to you hun! What's up?"

"Mum, I... I just need someone to speak to. I need advice." Simon quietly cried.

"Simon, what's wrong love? Why are you crying? Are you alright honey?"

Simon shook his head before realising his mum couldn't see him. "No. Mum I messed up, so bad. I... I almost lost the boy I love and... And I don't know what to do anymore. Everything has gone so horribly wrong."

"Simon, calm down. Tell me what happened."

"Me and Ethan. One of our friends didn't accept us and he made a video and we had a fight and I got angry and... And I hurt him mum. I hurt him so bad. He could've... Died." Simon sobbed, he heard his mum gasp from the other side.

"Listen honey, it's ok. It's ok Simon. Don't listen to this "friend", it's not worth it. If he doesn't accept you and Ethan then that's his problem, not yours. You love Ethan, and Ethan loves you. Nothing can change that. Forget about the past, think about the future. How are you going to help Ethan recover? How are you going to help both of you recover? Ethan really does love you hun, I've seen it in his eyes when he looks at you. His love for you won't die so easily. And I will always be here for you Simon, I will always love you no matter what. Just remember that you both accepted yourselves - that's what matters most."

Simon wiped his tears and smiled a little. "Thank you so much mum. I love you."

"I love you too hun."

A/N
Thank you so much for 2.5K, you guys are amazing and the support and love I'm receiving from you guys is really appreciated! I recently wrote an a/n (it's been deleted) in which I said a lot of things I was holding in and the love I received from you guys was unbelievable! I screen shotted them and read then whenever I'm feeling down and they bring me back up. I am so happy to have you guys reading and supporting. Love you.