Destiny Lawrence
February 16th 2024
Compton, California
"We're going to express ourselves and feelings by using, 'I feel' statements" our therapist said, "ja'rod would you like to go first?"
It had been about a month since everything exploded. We talked it out a few days after before ultimately deciding that we loved eachother and wanted to work on us.
We've been in couples therapy since late January and we haven't miss an appointment yet.
Me and ja'rod are in a very good and peaceful space in our relationship. We haven't had huge blowups, only minor differences and we sat and talked and listened to eachother.
It had also been a month since I came to his house and we had sex. I notice i missed my period by a few days so I called ja'rod and told him. We got a pregnancy test to see what was the deal.
"I feel that we in a good ass please right now" he mumbles making me smile.
"Destiny, how do you feel?"
"I also feel that we're in a good space too"
"That's good to hear, you two have made progress—do you think the celibacy break helped?" The therapist asked.
"Honestly I do" I replied, "I feel like we've talked more and did more activities with eachother and with Kaiser"
"How is Kaiser dealing with everything?" She asked ja'rod.
"He aight, I got him a therapist too after my momma died and shit" ja'rod responded, "but he always liked Destiny so, he excited that we back on—he see her as a mom forreal"
"Destiny how do you feel about that?"
"I love that I'm like a mother figure to Kaiser, he's really like my son even though I didn't birth him or carry him" I licked my lips before continuing, "and it makes me happy to know that Kaiser likes me and loves to be around e because I just want to be there for our baby like I am for Kaiser"
"How far along are you now?" She asked me.
"Like five or six weeks" I looked at ja'rod, seeing him nod.
"Yea" he let out sigh as he chuckled.
"Ja'rod are you excited about the pregnancy?"
"Yea man" he said with a slight smile, " I'm glad we found out together, the way we wanted—well not the way we wanted but it was different from the first time"
"Have you spoken about the loss of your first child?"
"Nah" he spoke lowly.
"Well I would like you two to use the 'I feel' or 'I felt' statements to express how you felt when you found out that you were expecting, then in the moment of your loss and what happened after"
"Now I understand that this may be a extremely sensitive and difficult topic to discuss but this is an important step to move forward"
"Okay" I said as I began to feel nervous.
"Alright this was a great session, I'll see you two next week" our therapist said as we stood up.
"See you next week" I said and ja'rod grabbed my hand as we walked out of the room.
I cleared my throat when we got outside, "it feels good out here—my type of weather"
