a new era of me

~fucked~

~Adaline Rosewood~

~September 30th~

These past few days felt rushed, rushed yet extremely exhausting. Plus the first official quidditch match is tomorrow.

Ravenclaws against Slytherins.

The kiss between Riddle and I happened... five.. six days ago, I can't place it. Yet I couldn't get the sensations out of my head.

It was like it had happened yesterday.

Every time that I tried to sleep.

And even as the day went on,

I was haunted by the kiss, the kiss and more between us.

There wasn't anything between us but then again, there was.

And I couldn't stand it. I couldn't stand how much I liked it.

I just felt so sick, horrible, gross, and disgusting.

The list could honestly go on.

I was just repulsed by everything.

I had a boyfriend, and here I was fantasising about Riddle of all people.  It was wrong that I was even fantasising in general, but if it was anyone? I'd prefer it not to be Riddle.

If this doesn't scream "fucked", I don't know what does.

I felt like a complete fool at this point.

I simply dont understand.

What is wrong with me?

I sighed and pushed off the bed, I was in Percy's dorm.  I was in his dorm when all I could think about.. was Riddle.

It was just ridiculous, absolutely and utterly ridiculous.

I made my way through the room and entered the bathroom.  Percy was still asleep, so, free shower for me.

I slowly and sleepily undressed before I got into the shower.

The warm water washing away a school weeks worth of stress.

And the revolting thoughts of Riddle.

This happens every time something odd happens between us.

I love Percy. 

I feel like I'm betraying him in some way. 

He's a good guy, besides what he has to say about me here and there.

We've been so good lately, we went back on that date that was.... Postponed.

For obvious reasons that I shall not even form a thought about.

And we had a great time.

I got out the shower, changed then snuck out to go visit Draco, I promised I'd wear his stupid scarf for tomorrow's game.

I wandered around the Slytherin common room and came across his dorm finally, I knocked and no reply.