Shutter ❋ Joe Sugg AU

1 ❋ Amelia

The gif is Amelia fyi :)

***

"Hold still Lia, don't you know that you can't move when you take a photo? Yes that's right baby girl, keep that smile on your pretty little face. Keep your eyes up here darling, don't look at anything else."

"Lia, look at Daddy! He's pulling a funny face!"

"Okay, Mummy's going to push the button now. 1, 2, 3..."

The dream disappeared in a flash of light, and immediately afterwards my eyes opened. I could still hear the faint echoes of my mothers gentle voice ringing in my ears - I sat up in my bed with a thumping heartbeat, although I had no idea why. It clearly wasn't morning, judging by the dark sky outside my window and the muffled snores that could be heard through the walls of our apartment. Troye was staying at the hospital tonight, but Tyler was definitely asleep.

I rolled out of bed, my coordination definitely not good at this ungodly hour. I stumbled towards the light switch beside my door, and upon switching it on I saw my messy room in detail. I ran my sleepy gaze over the messy bedspread, the northern wall that was covered in photos, the wooden desk that was one inch from death - everything was in place. Everything except for my camera.

I sighed deeply and opened my bedroom door, causing a pool of light to spill onto the dark carpet. I tip toed out of my bedroom and through the narrow hallway that lead to the bulk of our apartment. The lounge, kitchen and living area combined were all shrouded in darkness - I switched on the lights tentatively, as if the clicking noise would disturb someone.

I looked around yet again, under cushions, on table tops, in drawers, behind the curtain - all the ridiculous places I could think of. Still, I got no results. Part of me knew that my search attempts were futile - I just didn't want to accept that I left my camera on that park bench, where it was exposed to the weather, animals, thieves - I shuddered at the thought of my camera in the hands of someone other than myself.

Eventually I stopped my fruitless searching and flopped onto the couch, my frustration building with each passing second. I could feel it pressing against my throat, burning my eyelids and churning in my stomach. I cursed out loud, and punched one of the cushions in anger.

I felt irrational tears trailing down my cheeks, and I didn't have the motivation to wipe them away. What were the odds of me finding my camera again? Millions of people lived in this city - there were an infinite amount of places I could look, and I honestly wouldn't know where to begin.

By the time I turned the lights back off and slouched back to my bedroom, the tears coating my cheeks had dried. I felt absolutely spent, my anger and complete self hatred draining all of my energy. As I curled up in my bed I clung onto that minuscule ounce of hope left in me, hope that maybe the camera was still on the bench where I left it. Tomorrow morning before work I would go back to the bridge.

***

It wasn't there. It was 8am on a Wednesday and the sky was only just beginning to light up. The birds were tweeting incessantly as they flitted through the leaves above me, calling to each other, perhaps making plans for the day ahead. I suddenly felt apt to turn around and walk back to my apartment, where my comfortable bed was waiting for me.

I had woken up early, leaving a sleeping Tyler behind. I had wasted my energy for nothing. My legs, eyes, mind and heart were all tired and the disappointment that wallowed in my chest was doing nothing to help me. I knew it was a long shot but that didn't stop me from daring to hope. As I stared at the desolate bench I felt that hope drift away from me in the flurries of autumn wind.