Shutter ❋ Joe Sugg AU

33 ❋ Amelia

The next week passed slowly and often painfully. I scanned my showcase album and sent it to every magazine company I could think of. I even met with a few companies to show them my album in person. I remembered my interview with National Geographic the most - I felt self conscious sitting in that hard plastic chair, watching a greying man in a striped suit slowly leaf through my most precious images. I watched his face intently, waiting for an expression of some kind to show on his face. When he finished turning the pages he set the book down, cleared his throat and announced that he didn't think my style of photography was suited to the magazine.

That was my first rejection and it stung like a slap to the face. All of my other interviews had resulted in an indifferent 'We'll be in contact.', and even that was better than a stone cold no.

Joe cheered me up every time I started to lose faith in myself. He himself was enrolling in a business course that would commence after christmas. He still wasn't sure what he wanted out of his life but I assured him that this was a start.

I didn't speak to Troye about Connor, however things were a bit different between us. I wasn't good at hiding my true feelings and so I couldn't pretend to be happy for him. I just thought that Tyler would treat him better than Connor appeared to. Tyler himself hadn't yet met Connor and of course he heard nothing about him, so he was as happy as he could be. It was still clear to me that he desperately wanted Troye.

Christmas approached, and the days passed without any word from Dan. I didn't mind, but I still wondered how he was doing from time to time.

On Christmas eve I travelled home to Yorkshire to stay with my Dad, and some other family members. Specifically my aunt, uncle, grandma and cousins. My cousin Leah had her own little boy now, his name was Paddy and he was absolutely charming. I used up three rolls of film just taking photos of him, and everyone else. Even though the mood in our little cottage was cheerful and the champagne was flowing, I felt emotional when we started to talk about Mum. We talked about her every year at Christmas, and grandma would tell stories about her, and Aunty Liz would always end up crying.

Nobody went to bed until around 11 at night (except for little Paddy of course) and by then it was just Dad and I left awake.

"How've you been freckles?" Dad called me by my childhood pet name for the first time in years. I giggled and wondered if that was brought about by his 6th glass of champagne.

"I'm doing great Dad. I've... met somebody."

Dad looked at me with wide eyes. I giggled again, probably because I was tipsy.

"Well I'm happy for you freckles. Bring him around sometime, yeah?"

I nodded enthusiastically. My dad wasn't a big talker, so I wasn't surprised when he didn't grill me with questions about Joe.

"What about you dad? Have there been any ladies in your life recently?" I said, grinning when he turned red like a tomato.

"No, no, I'm afraid not."

I asked him that question often, because I hated to see him in this house alone. It ate me up inside to think of him here by himself while I was in London constantly surrounded by people. I knew he had his friends that he drunk with at the pub, but really he needed someone to be close to. Mum would want that for him.

"You know it wouldn't hurt to just go on a date Dad..." I said quietly, in an encouraging tone. He was a good looking man for his age, and I knew there was a few single ladies in the area with their eye on him.

"Yeah, I suppose not... But, I don't know if I could freckles."

"Yes you could dad, mum would want-"