The Heart Chronicles

➳ Late Night Thoughts

It is always late at night when I discover how alone I am

When I discover that maybe, I was designed to be lost and never found

I convince myself that it is better that way

That a solitary diamond is certainly better than a pair of intertwining hands

But the truth is, I am no diamond

If anything, I am the invisible rock in the background 

I am the thing that is just there, yet not exactly recognizable 

And for so long I have put the blame on myself

For so long I have stared in the mirror and concluded that I am the mistake

And maybe I am

Maybe I am the reason why every person I meet decides to go the opposite way

I try to reason that it's just that everyone I meet is too much like me

I try so hard to tell myself that it's just like what everyone says

Likes repel and opposites attract

and that I haven't found my opposite yet

But it feels as though I was designed to repel everyone around me 

Both opposites and likes

And I can't do anything to stop it 

I can't seem to invite anyone to come in 

I can't seem to let any damn person into my life

And maybe it's because I'm too lost in my own world

maybe I am a lost thing with no sense of gravity

a floating star without the gleam or a galaxy to belong to 

a missing letter neither the writer or receiver cared enough to know about its fate

Maybe, just maybe, I was destined to be the unmatched soul

Maybe I just was

Maybe

l.a.