Freshman Year: sHE beLIEveD & sHE's brOKen

3: "Call me old fashioned, but I actually take relationships seriously."

"Call me old fashioned, but I actually take relationships seriously."

That night nothing exciting happened, just dinner, and getting to know each other. The real story starts with Carter the next day.

Joey introduced us when orientation was over and everyone was leaving the building. Instantly Carter and I bonded. We could talk about tons of things and he seemed to be thoughtful. He had orange hair and wore his baseball cap backwards and had the typical sports look.

            Carter and I walked off on our own together and chatted. He could actually hold a conversation, which surprised me. We talked philosophy, and concepts about the world.

            Over the next week Carter and I were always together hanging out. He was quite the gentleman, if I may say so myself. He held doors open for me, carried my bag, refilled my drink, walked me to my dorm room at night, and made sure I ate as he quickly learned about how picky I was with my food. Though, I found out he had a girlfriend back home. That was sad, but I accepted it. I didn’t know where that left Carter and I as people actually joked about us being a couple.

            Carter admitted after a week that he had feelings for me and I asked, as any normal person would, “What about your girlfriend back home?”

            “I don’t want to end it over a text, just wait until winter break, and I will do it then,” he told me.

            It’s not like Carter and I had done anything, no! Especially since he had a girlfriend. It’s just, there was something there, between us, and we knew it. Carter would be in my dorm room talking to Alli and I until midnight, and I would walk him out every night and he would give me a hug goodnight. Except that each night the hugs were longer and more intimate, which confused the hell out of me.

            As our friendship strengthened, I opened up to Carter. I told him every defense I had. And I have a lot of defenses! And better yet, I have trust issues, so it was a big deal for me to open up to Carter about, well, everything! Carter opened up to me as well, and I appreciated it. He reminded me of my father in the way that Carter had to save every last cent. And I understood why he did that. Carter was paying for his college tuition all by himself, and that was admirable.

            What was not admirable was on week two, Thursday night, Carter, Alli, and I went over to his friend’s dorm, and watched a sci-fi TV show until midnight. Joey was there with his other friend. I had brought my batman blanket. The dorm beds were raised up high, so the underneath was like a fort.

Carter grabbed my batman blanket and went under the bed. I followed and tried to get it back from him, but was unsuccessful because I was so tired. Carter released the blanket and I fell back onto the beanbag chair. Carter lay down opposite me, and covered himself in my batman blanket. I pulled the batman blanket up towards me, and Carter grumbled. I quickly fell asleep as the rest of our friends continued watching TV.

            Suddenly I woke up to a strange sensation on my leg. I felt Carter’s hands going up and down it. Now I’ve had no experience with guys, so I had no idea what to do. I didn’t want to make a scene, so I stayed quiet. I readjusted myself, but that gave Carter more space for him to go further up. His hand was trailing up my leg, and reached the end of my shorts, but he kept going, all the way to my panty line, and then went back down to my ankle. I shivered from the foreign feeling. He then sat up, and so did I. He smiled at me, and moved so he was lying beside me. He put his arm around me and I was in and out of a daze for the rest of the night. Does this mean he has chosen me over his girlfriend? I thought in my head as Carter’s hands moved again. This time to my chest area. Carter’s hand went across my stomach next as I silently thanked myself for not eating much that day.  He didn’t do anything but feel me up and down, but it was big for me since I never let anyone touch me. I mean I don’t even hug my family!