Freshman Year: sHE beLIEveD & sHE's brOKen

29: "If he doesn't chase you after you walk away, keep walking."

“If he doesn’t chase you after you walk away, keep walking.”

That evening Nelson came over and we talked for the shortest amount of time before my mom came in.

         “Mom, can I please go to the concert with Nelson,” I asked.

         “Vanna, I thought-“

         “But I’m feeling better now. Do you want me here moping in your room or out trying to have fun?” I challenged.

         “Okay, but Nelson, do not let her drink. She can’t handle it right now. Also make sure she eats. And have her back by ten. Those are the rules and you can go,” My mom said.

         “Will do, trust me I won’t let her drink, and I will make sure she eats and she will be home by ten,” Nelson promised as I smiled and got dressed up.

         “Yay! Thank you mom! Thank you!” I said hugging her goodbye.

         “My friends weren’t expecting you, and god. When they found out you and Michael were over they asked me what I did,” Nelson said.

         “What?” I asked shocked.

         “I know. I told them it wasn’t me and they didn’t believe me,” Nelson said.

         “Well it wasn’t you. It was me. But Michael said he was leaving me because he loved me and wanted me to get help,” I said.

         “Bullshit,” Nelson said laughing.

         “What? What do you mean?” I asked getting scared.

         “It’s bullshit. Well I am sure he wants you to get help, but it’s complete bullshit, he said that so you wouldn’t be upset,” Nelson said.

         “Are you fucking kidding me?” I said getting angry.

         “Nope, and well…I shouldn’t say it,” Nelson said.

         “You better say it or you’re dead!” I growled.

         “Okay, but well, eh it doesn’t matter you two are over anyways. He came to me about two weeks ago saying he was considering breaking up with you, but he didn’t because of the family dinner and meeting your mom,” Nelson said and I felt like I’d been kicked in the stomach.

         “Are you kidding? Holy fuck! No…seriously, but he….that fucking…that fucking asshole was physical with me last week! God I feel like an idiot! And why the fuck would he be physical if he was planning on ending it?!” I growled feeling myself ready to explode.

         “Hey, he said he wanted to try and work it out, so I think that was part of him trying to work it out. But yeah…I don’t know. Not the best I guess, but I don’t know,” Nelson said.

         “Nelson…” I said stopping and trying to hold my tears in.

         “Hey, shh, it’s okay,” Nelson said hugging me, “Do you want to go back?” Nelson asked.

         “No! You know what, fuck him. He told me not to go out tonight, but hey, now I don’t even feel guilty for it. Hell no, we are going to that concert and we are going to have fun!” I said trying to not let it get me down that Nelson knew Michael was going to do this and that it was probably a lie…

         Getting to the park we met up with Nelson’s sister Carter and Will and James. I was okay for a while but I exploded with anger when someone mentioned Michael and then calmed myself. We sat down and listened to the music, while Nelson disappeared someone making me feel not safe. The park was crowded and what if Reece were there. Nelson came back and saw my relief.