The Blog [cake 5SOS] ✔

[Post #9] ['Forget About It']

Calum

Oh shit. Why did I just do that? I'm beginning to sweat, and although only a second passes, I'm out the room, down the stairs, onto the street. The cool air blows away the tension that's building up, and slowly, the effect of the alcohol wears off. I reach my front door, panting and sweating, and when mum opens the door with an uncertain look, I dash past her up the stairs and into the bathroom.

I take a quick shower and dry myself, before climbing into my duvet and blasting music from my CD player.

I can't help but sigh. I know Luke 'likes' me but this kind of thing is known to break friendships up. With my head against the wall tiles, I close my eyes and think. 

I come to the conclusion that it would be more beneficial to leave this all behind. He doesn't know that I've read his blog anyway, so I could say it was the alcohol that rushed me into doing it.

I feel awful.

~

Luke

It has been two days. I haven't contacted him since, but I'm leaving it as it is until we are forced to talk.

I look at my phone at the vibration, to see a group message from Ashton. Great. An opportunity.

Ashton: band rehearsal?

Luke: yeah where

Michael: mine

Ashton: k cool. coming over. who needs picking up

Calum: mee

Luke: me

Luke: wait mum just said she will take me

Ashton: okay cal be at yours in ten be ready please

Calum: Luke just come with us?

Luke: it's ok.

Calum: ok then

Ashton: just Cal? luke make ur mind up

Luke: i already have...

Ashton: k coming cal bye guys

Michael: HURRRY UPPP U LAYZEE ASSES

Michael: looke u better not come late

Luke: i won't...

Michael: good

Luke: see you then

Calum: reply to my message luke

Calum: luke

Calum: luuuuuke

Michael: give up

Calum: LUKE HEMMINGS COME BACK HERE

Calum: lucas plz

Calum: plz

Michael: i said give up my phone is going mental

With a sniff, I lock my phone and get up. It's seven pm, we've had dinner, and I'm still in my pajamas. Well, time to get dressed. I pull on some blue jeans and black tee with a 5SOS hoodie over it, then fish out a pair of converse to finish the look. I look in my wardrobe mirror with a wink, then pick up my guitar and holler at mum to take me to Michael's.

"Doesn't Ash usually pick you guys up?" she shouts back.

"Um... yeah but he said he doesn't have room cause he's taking siblings to a club or something..." I reply awkwardly. 

"Okay then... I'll be half an hour."

"Half an hour? No mum we need to go now, pleeease..."

"Don't be so demanding Luke, I'm doing the dishes."

"Pleeeeeeease mum..."

"Luke, go back upstairs."

"PLEEEEEEEEEEASEEEEE I'LL DO THE DISHES EVERYDAY OF THE WEEK FOR YOU PLEASE!"

She sighs and shakes her head, wiping her hands on a cloth and picking up the keys from the table. 

"Honestly. You need to start focusing on your career, not some band... hurry up, have you got everything?" she asks because she knows I'll leave something stupid like my guitar behind.

I smile, and reply, "Yeah I've got everything."

"Okay. Come on then."

[Post #9] ['Forget About It']

Wednesday 15/8/12 22:35

Dear C.H., 

I'm kinda at a loss for words, really. Our rehearsal today went well, there's no doubting that, but it just didn't feel right. As soon as I arrived, you pulled me to the side whilst the others tuned and warmed up the amps, asking me how I was, and telling me to 'forget about it'.

Forget about it?

Are you mad?

That kiss was something I'd been yearning for, for so long. You can't begin to understand the complexities of my feelings, and that's the issue, that's why I'm so fucking pissed off at you. I'm angry and yet I still have visions of being with you. 

It won't be easy, these next few days, but I'll eventually get over it. I know I will. But there's something very important I need to do before then; staying with my girlfriend isn't going to solve anything. All I can think about when I'm with her is your butt, naked; so I'm going to end it. We've been together for a year. It's long enough for me to realise my feelings for you. Two months of writing this blog. It's time, I can sense it.

My goal will stay the same, and I can see our band progressing. I promise you C, one day you'll see that our kiss wasn't to be regretted, it was to be remembered, because I hope alongside many things, that more will follow.

I'm going to take a moment to thank all 179 followers of this blog. Your comments keep me happy, give me advice, and tell me when I'm just being a weak little shit. So thank you. I'll keep you updated, I promise.

Love can't really be explained in words, but I feel as though through writing out my feelings and reactions in words, I can slowly piece together the jigsaw puzzles, see the final picture, and frame it/mix it up again. Hopefully C, you'll understand and help me complete the puzzle.

Yours,

Penguin <(")

petewentzisbae says: still can't believe u guys kissed!!! a.i needs to know about this

A/N: hooray! another chapter is UPPP

Hope you guys have had a good week. The weekend, yaaasss! I'm going to Sydney today and my train is like in 2 hours so I've gotta get dressed and stuff. 

Comment what you guys usually get up to on the weekends :)

I'm giving TWO dedications today to two very lovely people who have left copious votes in their trail: HEMMONATICS and littlemixer333 THANK YOU your virtual leaked 5sos song will be making its way towards you shortly! (jk jk i don't have any leaks plz don't ask me for any) BUT THANK YOU VERY MUCH, I REALLY DO APPRECIATE IT!

So here's your chance to be noticed: just go ahead and vote/leave a quirky comment and I'll mention you :) I don't have a big audience but it's nice!

Okay then! See you soon :D

Kimmy xx