Until eternity

Chapter 27

We have been filming all morning and just finished the part of the scene where Tris almost gets tossed into the chasm by some fellow initiates.  Theo has been standing right next to the camera watching as the guys and I struggle to fight each other.

I can tell he doesn't like this scene to much, its hard to see a female fighting for her life against a bunch of guys. 

As soon as Neil is satisfied with this part he starts filming when Four shows up and "saves Tris". I'm standing watching him "fight the guys" and I am just amazed at her strength.

He is so strong, masculine, and...and what am I telling myself. I snap out of it, and remind myself I need to keep my thoughts professional.

I can't let my personal feelings get in the way of my professional ones. Theo is a great friend and I don't want to do anything to change that.

Once Neil is satisfied with the fight scene we move to the scene where Four takes Tris to his apartment.

Theo grabs my hand and we start our lines. I'm looking into those eyes of his and its like I can see into his soul.

Next thing I know Neil is yelling cut. "Earth to Shai" are you okay? I look up and realize I have been staring at Theo saying nothing.

I'm sorry I laughingly say, and Theo just puts his hand on my knee and smiles. We get the scene down in the next few takes, and I rush out once Neil says we are done with this scene. 

I take off running through the hall way and outside. I feel like I can't breathe. What is happening I say to myself.

I don't really like myself right now. I told myself a long time ago I wouldn't allow myself to feel this way about anyone again.

I am especially angry that these feelings are not only about a co-star, but a unavailable co-star. I mean this goes against everything I believe in.

I'm conflicted to be honest with you. I  believe we are all destined to have that one soul mate. Ever since I met Theo, I feel like we have known each other for a lifetime.

Maybe in another life we knew each other. I'm sitting on the curb when I hear the doors open behind me. I close my eyes hoping it isn't Theo.

I feel a hand lean down and reach for my shoulder, I look up and it is exactly who I don't want it to be, THEO.

I smile and say Hey! He sits down next to me and asks if I am okay. I let him know I just needed a little air, and he can tell something is bothering me.

He smiles and sits next to me in silence. We are both sitting there in silence when I decide I better say something.

I elbow him, and ask how his day is going so far. He looks at me with a little curiosity and I can tell he decides to let it go.

"Fine Shai!" I'm a bit sore from all the fight scene takes and with that we just start talking about the movie.

I'm glad Theo decides not to ask me what is going on. We are just chatting away when I hear the door bust open and out comes Zo. 

She tells us we need to get back to work. Theo jumps up and offers me a hand. He gives me a hug and nudges Zoe, says he will see us inside.

Zo looks at me as soon as Theo is gone, and asks what is up. I let her know we will talk about it later, because for now we have to get to work.

We've worked on several different scenes and when Neil finally yells CUTS,  we are done for the day, everyone starts clapping. We are all exhausted.