Tips To Survive the Zombie/Undead Apocalypse

Tip Number Ten

Tip Number Ten

“Don’t stop for people you know”

Submitted by Angel_Eyes24

This tip name was submitted by Angel_Eyes24. Please check out her works and fan her. Thank you!

                For tip number ten Angel_Eyes24 nailed it right on the spot. Don’t stop for people you know. And when I say this I mean it. Do not stop whatever you do.

                Let’s say one of your parents has turned into a zombie and you happen to cross them at your nearby supermarket. Do you stop and say, “Hey mom! How’s life been? Want me to bring the groceries home?”  No! You run like a leprechaun away from that gut eating freak. Sure, she’s your blood and soul but at this point you don’t want to be eaten by your own mother.

Also in boyfriend/girlfriends situations: You’ve loved this person all you short teen life and when they finally reach out to you a zombie bites their shoulder and is randomly blown off by the wind. Here are two scenarios:

Scenario Number One: You run to your zombie boyfriend crying your eyes out for his infection. You hug and kiss him hoping for the few moments that he will hold you in his arms. Then, flustered, you feel a large bite on your cheeks. You only have a split second to realize that you’ve been bitten. You also then realize that loving a blundering idiot is just, well, idiotic.

Scenario Number Two: You run to your zombie boyfriend crying your eyes out for his infection. You get out your handy dandy pan from your ZASP and smack that sucker until he is paralyzed. Then you run like a monkey on steroids away from his body.

Now aren’t you happy you’re alive?

Sooooo To Round Off Tip Number Ten…

Don’t love thy neighbor, during the apocalypse you save yourself then mourn their death. (No offense to hardcore church goers. Just a joke. I somewhat believe in the miracle blah blah blah…)