You're Hurting Me From Inside Of My Head- Nathan Sykes vampire fanfic

Chapter 8

Heyyyyy! I'm sorry this update has taken longer than the previous few but to be honest, I've not been happy with them but I'm quite pleased with this one so I think I'm going to take a bit longer to update from now on because as much as it's important that you like it but also if I like it. :)

Nathan's POV

"Well?" Lucas asked. Was I really going to give myself up for Lili? Was I willing to become a monster for some girl? No, never. I don't want to be evil, I want to be Nathan that's all I've ever wanted and I didn't want to lose that like I know I can... I've been trying so hard to suffocate the darkness inside of me but it's so so hard. I know it would be a lot easier to just let go but I don't want to, I want to be me... But Lili isn't some girl. She's Lili. The same Lili that I've known and been best friends with since I could walk. The same Lili that could make me laugh when I'm feeling down. The same Lili that I've been completely, ridiculously in love with since we were young. The same Lili I can finally say loves me too. So change the question: was I really willing to become a monster to save the love of my life? No... No I'm still not ready. I don't want to become like them. I want to be me, I don't want to lose who I am. But looking up and seeing Lili looking as white as a sheet and covered in her own blood, I knew I couldn't be selfish. There was never really a question as to whether I would save her if I had to, just a bit of debating and reluctance, but I always knew that I would.

"I accept." I said, my voice was clear and powerful despite the dread coursing through me.

"What? Nathan you can't go!" Jay cried out while jumping forwards but dragged back by Siva who sensed that it was a bad idea.

"I can't leave her there!" I said, trying not to look back and see the looks of betrayal, sadness and shock.

"Well Nathan... At least you're not a coward." Lucas laughed sinisterly.

"I'm not doing this to look good to you." I spat, scowling at him.

"Ooh temper I see. Not bad." He said and I couldn't tell whether he was actually impressed or was mocking me and to be honest I didn't know which one was worse for me.

Then I did what I never wanted to do. I stepped out of line from the boys and moved over to where Lili was, crossing over from good to evil- it felt monumental. I glanced up at the boys and their looks broke my heart: Tom was furious, Siva was saddened, Jay looked away- I thought it was because he was ashamed but when he made a sudden chocking sound I realised it was because he was fighting back the tears, Max looked confused and Siva looked disappointed in me. I couldn't take it anymore so I looked away and looked at Lili.

"Why did you do that? Go back! Go back!" Her face contorted with confusion and anger as she screamed at me, hitting me repeatedly.

"What? I'm doing this to protect you!" I was genuinely confused... I literally just saved her life and she was mad at me.

"Who's going to protect me from you when you turn?" She screeched again. She sobbed and sobbed, I imagine she would have brought her hands to her face to hide if her hands weren't chained together.

"Please go back." She cried.

"Too late for that." Lucas interjected.

"NO! You can still go back, just go back!" She yelled, attempting to push me towards the boys.

"I don't think so." Lucas said. Suddenly, Drake grabbed Lili and they disappeared

"WHAT DID YOU DO WITH HER?" I roared but before I got an answer, I felt hands clamp down on mine and I was... Somewhere else. I don't know how and I don't know where but I just was. I looked around and saw that we were in a corridor, purely built out of large, grey bricks and cement. Dull. Grey. I spotted Lili ahead of me and I made a mad dash towards her, struggling free from Antony who gave up rather easily.