You're Hurting Me From Inside Of My Head- Nathan Sykes vampire fanfic

Chapter 28

Oooh good news! My other fanfic has come to an end and although there is a sequel, I won't be starting it until after this one is finished so you'll get an update every week! (For 2 weeks until it's over... Oh well!) I'm sort of just tying up loose ends from now on but I've tried to make it as interesting as possible. (Please check out my other fic if you haven't!) 

These chapters have suddenly gone from like 2000 words to like over 2500 like this one is over 3000!

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Nathan's POV

"Nathan, go see her!" Jay shouted from the other side of my door, he was banging his fists against it and I'm pretty sure that if he had spent a little bit longer in the gym that he could have knock the door off its hinges. I was lying in bed like I had been for the past day, refusing to get up and do what I was supposed to do. I knew wallowing in self pity wouldn't help anyone and it would certainly get me into trouble but surely they had seen how difficult it was for me and how Lili's case was much worse than other's had been.

"No I'm not going!" I groaned into my pillow. Surprisingly, I had managed to sleep for the majority of the time that I had been in my room, I knew it was a very un-vampire thing to do but I was a lazy human so it seemed plausible that that behaviour had transferred into my new life.

"It's nothing personal mate!" Jay shouted back since my room was large and my bed was situated on the far side of the room. I knew what he was saying was true since I had been in that situation myself and I had called the boys such awful things but they knew that it wasn't really me talking and I didn't mean it but with Lili it was different.

"I can't stand there and listen to the things she says to me, Jay! It's breaking my heart and I'm going to do something I regret!" I admitted and I could hear Jay sigh, he was beginning to give up on me, I was always going to be a lost cause, I was weak. When I said that I had slept a lot I was being truthful however my sleep was filled with recurring nightmares containing all of the obscenities that she had shouted at me and I'd wake up sobbing, wondering how much longer I could sustain our relationship knowing that she had said these things.

"We've all had to do it!" Jay yelled, suddenly feeling a surge of confidence and of course I knew it to be true. I was around when Jay and Max had turned their girls and they were in an awful state for the whole time but they weren't anything like me and Lili wasn't anything like the girls.

"I know that Jay but this is different!" I shouted and I could almost hear Jay's fury building from where I was since I was insinuating that Lili was more important than anyone else which wasn't really what I had meant to say.

"Explain it to me then because we can't understand." Jay sighed, he didn't seem to think that it was but he knew that I wouldn't let it go.

"She's a HD and she has spent all of her vampire life in the dark clan and she shouldn't have been there. Her thirst was already going to be difficult but it's just ten times worse than mine was! She is hurting more than I have ever witnessed or experienced and I can't- I can't watch that, I can't." I said, my voice was quieter than it was before. Partly because I didn't really want him to hear and partly because I was too busy desperately suppressing my sobs. I could not appear to be weak, I just murdered a hundred people and I'm a vampire for God's sake, I couldn't cry.

"I'll talk to Tom." I hear Jay sigh. He clearly hadn't got the energy to try and come up with an argument against me. Also, he probably didn't want to come into my room and deal with me whilst I cried my eyes out to him which was inevitable.

I decided that it would be best to shower as soon as possible to avoid such instances such as Tom walking in the room whilst I was half naked and trust me, it had happened before. So I jumped out of my slightly smelly bed since I had not left it for a day and headed into the shower, allowing the warm water to wash away any evidence of the past few days and relax my mind and body.