The Girl Next Door > jariana (COMPLETED)

thirty-four

Ariana

I hated myself.

We sat in his driveway for a long time. He rolled down the windows and turned the radio on really low. The Foo Fighter's 'Never Wanna Die' was playing. I couldn't help but think that one day Justin would be as big as them. He would be like Dave Grohl. I wondered what it would be like, if we really stayed together. I knew it was probably impossible, we were too young, I thought somberly.

"Hey," he said, putting a halt to my churning mind. "Wha'cha thinking' about?"

"You," I said honestly.

"And?" he asked, squeezing my hand.

"About last night."

"Yeah, go on. Stop torturing me," he said laughing, pulling on my arm for me to come closer to him.

"Just that how it's all happened so fast, and now you're gonna be gone, like it never happened at all."

"Ari, that's not true," he said, burying his face in my hair.

"Ew, don't do that," I said pulling away. "I really want to brush my teeth."

***

I entered Justin's bathroom and took the mouthwash out from under the sink and rinsed the rancid taste from mouth. Opening the vanity drawer, I remembered the toothbrush he'd given me a while back, and there it was sitting right next to his. Moving into the shower I heard my phone vibrating on the bathroom counter. I worried it was my mother and hoped it was my brother or the girls. I quickly rinsed off and hurried to dry myself. I reached over to check my phone and my stomach sank. The text was from Mike. I'd forgotten we'd exchanged numbers earlier.

HEY , SORRY ABOUT TONIGHT. HOPE IT DIDN'T CAUSE TOO MUCH TROUBLE W JUSTIN. P.S. DON'T TELL HIM I TEXT U. HE'LL BLOW IT OUT OF PROP - M.

My heart raced. I looked behind me like Justin would be standing there looking over my shoulder, as if, only the towels hanging from a hook on the door stared back at me. Stupid Mike. You know he'd be upset. So why are you texting me? I thought, wishing I could say it to his face. Justin was right about that shit you made me drink.

At least Mike was sorry for putting me in an awkward situation. I thought about Justin's deal with Mike and didn't agree with Justin's assessment of it all. Justin was being a hypocrite, but I wasn't going to point that out, at least not yet. Mike joined the band thinking he was getting a party buddy as part of the package. Whatever, it wasn't my problem. I just needed to be careful, like I was told.

I stood still for a long moment and closed my eyes. The spins were finally gone. Thank goodness for a shower and water. I made a promise to myself that I'd never drink like that again.

Justin was already lying in his bed looking super comfy under the covers. The back door was open and I worried that his mother or Notting would come out to the back yard and see us. I walked over shutting it.

"No, leave it open," he said startling me.

I jumped. "Justin," I whispered. "I thought you were asleep. I won't be able to relax let alone sleep if this is open and your parent's home."

"Alright, turn the fan on then?" he asked, pointing at a switch at the far wall.

No matter how many times we've kissed, the thought of doing it again with him made me weak at the knees. He looked perfectly rumpled as I rushed over, crawling up next to him.

"Nothing's ever gonna match this, ever in my life," I purred. I didn't give a shit if I sounded like a lovesick teen. I was, so whatever.

He inched over closer, lying on his side, caressing my leg. I didn't care if I got grounded for the rest of the summer. I didn't care if my parents found out in the morning. I was too tired to cover my tracks, too tired to text Nicole, Nadine or my brother. This was the last night of my life as far as I was concerned.