The Girl Next Door > jariana (COMPLETED)

fifty-one

Justin

Time flies when you're numb. I could hardly believe I'd graduated high school. It all seemed so unreal, because I hadn't walked with my friends and classmates wearing our black cap and gowns trimmed in blue. I'd still yet to receive my diploma in the mail, and it'd been four weeks. You plan your life based on how it goes for the majority, but then you're the minority, which makes life seem tougher, this was my conclusion. I'll always wonder if I'd lived a normal life, would anything have been that much different.

I sat slumped down in one of Amy's black leather chairs and watched her fritter around her apartment in a white slip dress that was so sheer you could see her animal print underwear. I'd come to understand that's just who she was, a bohemian hippy, happy to be alive and sober. She was the only one who understood me at the moment.

I'd fallen off the pill pop wagon and got back on again. Six months had passed since I'd beat Mike unconscious and I was picking up the pieces, trying to hold my band together and keep my distance from Ariana. We were finally signed to an independent label, under the Universal umbrella and one of our songs had hit radio with a little bit of success, but with all that, I still felt like I was missing an appendage.

"What's the scoop? You headin' home today? I heard you talking that you were going to your mom's." Amy said as she plopped down on the floor, placing her lunch plate in front of her. "You want some? It's turkey avo on wheat."

"I hate avocado."

"Yeah, well, maybe it'll do ya some good." She took a huge bite and waved her finger at me as she chewed. "You need to get tested tomorrow. Don't forget. This will be it, then you should be off probation."

My stomach turned with excitement and I smiled. "Yeah, it'll be nice to have all that shit behind me."

She looked at me cautiously. "Is it really behind you? Don't screw with me, can't con and conman, you know. I feel it, I see it, and there ain't nothing behind you yet."

Her question dug at me and I ignored it, getting up. "Okay, I'm out of here. Thanks for letting me crash, eat you out of house and home and all that shit."

Amy looked at me thoughtfully and took a drink of her water, smacking her lips. "Take care, Justin. You've come a long way. You're 18 and you've been given a gift and too many second chances. You really need to put to rest the things that hold you down. You're wings have grown back, fly away."

Amy's used all those words so many times. They finally resonated for so long I began to believe them. "I know and that's why I'm making some drastic changes."

"What?" Interest pitched up her tone.

I sighed, still unsure if I'd pull the trigger. "I'll let you now when I make the jump." I smiled cleverly and walked out the door.

I'd come to really care about Amy. She'd turned into the big sister I'd never had. Between her and Notting, they were my rocks. I was forced to move in with Notting to get away from Ariana's next door presence and I'd barely spoken to my mother ever since, mainly because she didn't have anything to say to me. In her eyes, I'd gone crazy and she wondered what she did wrong. I'd had enough of hearing how my life choices were about her. I didn't think she'd ever change. I dreaded telling her of the bands plans.

After much deliberation with Notting and the band, we all agreed and decided a change would do us good, especially after the offer Notting was presented with. We were offered a huge European tour and I was still in shock about it. I drove to my mother's to give her the news and to talk to Mr. Grande. Ariana was still all I could think about. I loved her too much to sit by and watch her fail at things because of me.