When I Grow Up (Seventeen Jeonghan x CLC Seunghee)

Forty Six: When You're The Only One I Can Trust

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Jeonghan hopes to see Seunghee before he finally meets Nayeon but she isn't there. At the shady part of the park, where the trees blossom in the middle of spring, he doesn't want to see Nayeon but he needs to. If Seunghee doesn't show up, he'll just drag Nayeon to her, that's his real plan. He won't let this girl get away with it.

Nayeon is ashamed of what she has done. She actually has no face to show him, but she needs to make it right and apologize. She's already waiting for him by the river. It's windy and the tree leaves are getting carried away by it like in fall. He stops a few meters away from her, facing the river.

"So what do you want to tell me?" Jeonghan tells Nayeon, not even facing the girl. "You better not have anything else up on your sleeves."

"Jeonghan, I'm sorry. I know you love Seunghee. I know she loves you too. But I just had to gamble. It was never my first intention to hurt anyone. But it was inevitable along the way. If I never tried, I wouldn't have been satisfied. I wouldn't have proven myself that it's really hopeless. I know I did some very drastic things, but by doing those things, I got assured. Now I'm sure there can be nothing between us no matter how hard I try."

He doesn't respond her. He just needs to hear what she wants to say so he can deliberate on how to make his next move.

"And also, I just wanted to let you know that I've been in love with you since fifth grade."

It somehow surprises him. So this hidden scheme goes from way back. The same time Seunghee also felt the same for him.

Nayeon can't help her tears, she's finally losing him outright, for good. "And I regret that I had to be away from you all these years. If it had been different, I could have confessed to you way back even before you and Seunghee got together and didn't have to resort to all these foolish acts. It puts me to so much shame. I left my pride just to have to do what I can to reach you. But from the start, I was just fighting a losing battle. I knew deep inside that it can't be justified. I knew it myself that it was just a lie. That I had a chance with you."

He wants to tell her that himself, but she said it before he can talk.

"If it just isn't Seunghee, it wouldn't have been this painful. I didn't want to put our friendship into compromise but I had no choice. I had to choose. I had to choose you. And in the end, I didn't only lose you, I lost her too. Jeonghan-shi, can you help me talk to her? I need to tell her you have no part in this. That it's all on me alone. That way I can somehow correct the wrongs I've done."

That's the time he has to reply, "I thought I had to drag you to her to explain yourself. You get to her yourself. At least make some effort to repent on your acts."

He starts pacing away when Nayeon calls on him again, "Jeonghan-shi! Will you be able to forgive me?"

He doesn't hesitate in telling her before walking away, "It all depends on Seunghee."

As the wind blows the curls of her hair, Nayeon only watches as the man of her dreams slowly fade away from her for eternity. The pain, the guilt, the humiliation, all crush her at the same time. She doesn't think there's anything that will damage her more than this. From this moment on, she will never let time outdo her. She will never let anything like this ever happen again.

Somewhere hidden behind the trees, a person eavesdrops on them and sneakily leaves the same time Jeonghan does.

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For Nayeon, facing Seunghee is much harder than facing Jeonghan. Apologizing to her treasured friend for having done something so depraved is far more problematic. If she has no face to show Jeonghan, what else can she show Seunghee? But she has to. Yes, she wanted her guy for herself but she doesn't really intend to lose her. How selfish can she get? But she's not really rotten to the core. It just happened that he's her guy, that's all. Can someone really teach whom the heart chooses? Of course not. And it's just all a coincidence that she has to hurt her along the way with him.