Looking for the Light Through the Darkness

Chapter 53: No Music

Point of View: Victor 

I could feel the heat in my chest building the longer I talked to Jasmine on the phone. I should have just ignored her text message but when I saw the additions she was making to my schedule, I just couldn't stop. I had hit the dial button before I could even think about it. Why was she doing all of this? She knows that I would rather have a quiet life. But I was expecting a miracle if I thought she was actually going to think of someone other than herself. 

Taking a short breath, I heard the end of the line click and her shrill impatient voice appear on the other speaker. "Victor, I don't have time for this conversation. I am about to meet with a group of your supporters. Can't this wait?" Distain is clear in her voice making the pit in my stomach grow even larger. She didn't care at all. 

"No, Jasmine this can't wait. You seem to be under the impression that I can be in two places at once this week." I glare unhappily at the covers on the bed. 

Hearing an unhappy grumble from the other end of the phone, I can just picture her looking through that horrible date book she carried everywhere with her. Slowly leaning back against the best, I closed my eyes taking a second to breath trying to will away this anger that always ignites when I speak to my mother.  But that fails miserably as my mother's shrill voice comes back onto the speaker. 

"You will just have to leave one event early in order to make the other I guess." She states clearly annoyed that I couldn't have come up with this answer myself. Frowning, I run my fingers through my hair pulling on different strands in annoyance. 

"Mother. That isn't possible one is a performance and the other is-" Before I can finish my statement there is a sharp breath at the other end of the phone. 

"I don't care if it isn't possible. Mr Blackbourne is the one that goes through all of the events. He shouldn't have accepted it if it overlaps with something else. You would think the man could read a clock if he was your guardian." Instantly, I can feel the fire in the back of my throat. 

She had sucked all of the life out of my music. I couldn't stand to look at an instrument without becoming exhausted and overwhelmed. I could no longer come up with new songs to perform. I would just repeat the old ones with less emotion than before. And no one seemed to notice. My music was gone.

"Mother!" I yell into the phone angrily. "Are you serious? It is not Mr. Blackbourne's job to go through my schedule. That is your job. Maybe I just shouldn't go at all?! I bet that would do wonders for your career." I spit out into the phone staring at it with such hate. Standing up from my bed I begin to pace as my mother's voice can be heard screaming from the other end of the phone but I am no longer listening. 

Instead, my eyes have caught the movement of the bedroom door opening and a small thin figure appearing in the doorway. My heart almost stops in surprise. Quickly, I pull the phone away from my ear and I hear her soft frail voice call out my name. Dropping the phone on the bed, I move forward my eyes focused upon the small figure almost curled up in my doorway and suddenly I realize what has happened. I had been yelling. 

Kneeling down very slowly in front of her, I slowly touch her clenched hands causing them to flinch and then relax. "Victor." She whispers ever so quietly again this time revealing just how scared she really is. Feeling my heart pound with pain, I silently curse my mother as I lean forward gently brushing her beautiful blonde hair out of her face. 

"It's okay." I coo leaning closer to her. "It's okay. You are here with us. With me. There isn't anything to worry about." Feeling her figure tremble, I stay still as she slowly leans forward and wraps her arms around my neck allowing me to draw her closer. I had definitely scared her. 

Feeling her chest trembling against mine, I slip my fingers carefully around her waist, making sure not to cause her any pain, before lifting her up and into my arms.  Standing, I make sure to take every movement slower than normal in order to keep her comfortable.  Feeling her tuck her head into my neck, I carry her easily to my bed and place her on the edge before picking up my phone and hanging it up.  

What had she been doing outside of my room? 

Carefully unwrapping my arms around her small body, I can feel her hesitate to remove her arms from my neck and I quickly move closer. I had scared her. Slipping my hands into hers I allow her to focus on my touch in order to keep her grounded. "It's okay. I am sorry for yelling. My mother... she..." I stumble unsure what to say as she leans into my side. 

"It's okay." She states breathily and I slip one of my hands from her fingers to her cheek. Her hands instantly rush to hold my own against her face for comfort. Feeling my heart burst with pain, I kneel down in front of her and lightly caress her cheeks with my hands. I knew all to well what it felt like to be yelled at.  

Studying her small figure for a few moments, I realize she isn't sure what to do or say. "The reason why I was so angry is because of my schedule this week. While you were asleep, we had gotten our schedule for different jobs we need to run and my mother seems to have taken over my own. She had even scheduled one at the same time as another and expects me to be at both." I let out a slow breath trying not to get sucked back into my anger once more. But to my surprise, the appearance of small warm hands placed on my cheeks is what keeps me grounded in comfort. 

"Do you want to go to all of these events?" She asks quietly and I can feel my heart pound. 

No one had ever asked until now.

"I don't."