Splitting Hairs

Twenty

I hated him. Nang lumabas na silang lahat. I was trying to cover myself. Tinitigan niya 'ko. 'Yung parang hinuhubaran kung hindi ko pa alam na hubad na 'ko! I hissed. "Will you please get out?" I shouted at him. He didn't look pleased with himself. Gusto ko siyang lunurin sa bathtub. Then I'd make him eat the cake of soap. Hanggang sa magbula 'yung bibig niya.

Tignan ko lang kung makahalik pa siya ng ibang babae.

"What?" He asked innocently.

Napalingon ako dito.

"What what?"

"You look as if you would kill."

I smiled too sweetly. "Buti alam mo. Don't you want to ask who?"

He just shrugged. Then he took the soap.

"Anong gagawin mo?" I looked around me. Goodness, was this déjà vu? I had nowhere to go. Hindi naman ako kasya sa butas ng banyo. He smirked. Pinanlakihan ko siya ng mga mata. He shrugged. "Isn't it obvious?"

My mouth dropped open. Then his hands submerged under the water. I gasped. Nanlalaki ang mga mata ko ng—Oh, my God. My stomach churned. I sucked in my breath.

He scrubbed my stomach. Oh-kay. But his fingers were too close to hit home.

"Julian... I have hands." Parang batang bulong ko. I really croaked, didn't I? Then I closed my eyes. At isinandal ang ulo ko sa balikat niya. He was behind me. But he was fully clothed. Ano ba ang naiisip niya?

"What are they doing here?" Tanong ko sa kanya. "And what am I doing in this bathtub?"

Naramdaman ko ang pagdulas ng daliri ni Julian malapit sa gitna ko. At napasinghap ako. "Julian, stop." Mahina kong bulong. Nanghihina ako pero hindi ganon kahina para hindi makiliti. It was too... there. But not yet. Para akong maiihing pusa na hindi maintindihan.

And then Julian kissed me. Napaungol ako nung hinimas niya 'yung dibdib ko. Tumaas 'yung ulo niya. "Are you okay?"

"H-Ha?" Naguguluhang tanong ko. Hinabol ko 'yung bibig niya.

"Jeannie..."

Napalunok ako. Gusto kong isiping nag-aalala siya sa akin. Pero baka make-believe lang iyon. Topak lang ulit ni Julian. "Jeannie?"

"W-What?"

"I..." Umiling ito at hinalikan ako basta. Baliw ba ito at—

Nawala na. Ano nga ulit iyon? Napaliyad ako. My nips hit the surface of the water. His fingers were now in the middle of exploring the wilderness. At napapaangat ako ng pang-upo. He was behind me. He tilted me sideways to kiss me. At habang ginagawa niya iyon ay busy ang dalawang kamay niya. Isa sa boobies ko at isa sa perlas ng silanganan ko. Dammit. Julian was so good at this. So... so... so...

Shit.

"Julian... I can't... hmmm..." Naprolong na ulit sa bibig niya 'yung I can't. Because I already did.

Parang nanghihinang napasandal ako sa kanya. "Are we?"

Umiling ito. Napakunot-noo ako. He wouldn't? We wouldn't? Ganon lang? Pano siya?

I felt like sleeping. Satisfied. Heavy.

"Ako ang bahala sa 'yo."

That was only a snippet. A mere whisper. Bahala? Ha! If I know. There was something endearing about a man who said that he could take on the world for me. Sana totoo. Sana... hindi lang ako nananaginip. Julian wouldn't say something like that. Hindi na 'ko magtataka kung mas pa kung sasabihin niyang: 'I'll kill you Jeannie'.