Trouble ; Kim Taehyung

(Taehyung)

I thought that I really messed up this time.

|f l a s h b a c k |
-after confession-

She's furious and refuses to talk to me or even look at me. I thought I had done a great job at keeping the mood up but my good intentions were rewarded with a very frustrating consequence.

The air fills up with silence that slowly shape shift into an awkwardness wherein I have yo desperately hunt for a chance to talk to her, but every time I try to, her back would just scream 'I don't want to hear it!'

As we walk through the corridors, our shadows start to match our pace. I looked at the sky filled with clouds forming different shapes and figures. The most eye-catching part of this view is how the sun splatters it's colors everywhere we're walking on.

The breeze made my head drift to Eunsol's direction. Staring at her face turned away from me makes me feel lonelier than I already am. Not to mention the heels of her shoes took turns on making this clacking sound that resonates across the whole corridor as the distance between us grew, regret started to creep inside the depth of my soul.

It bothers me.

It bothers me that she got so mad at me even though we were even. It irks me and yet I feel like I've made a mistake worth dying for.

I briskly walk to catch up with her and as soon as she sees my shadow she walks twice as fast just to avoid me. What the heck is wrong with us. What the heck is wrong with me?

We continue this weird game that we hadn't even talked about until we reach the streets and it gets weirder when we get to the streets where some people gave us these unfulfilling looks I could barely notice the longer I stare at her because as I do so, seems like the world is getting further, and further away from my grasp. The sidewalk starts to disappear as the people passing by follow, too.

Suddenly coming to a full stop, the world bounces back into vision.

"Taehyung." She calls out

As soon as I hear her voice, I answer immediately still avoiding eye contact. "What?"

"You're such an idiot" She jumps into a slump of laughter leaving me confused, mad, embarrassed and relieved; all four emotions at once. It's absurd.

"What's the big deal!" I scream to hide the everything stirring up inside of me, hoping she doen't notice.

Casually she goes, "What is?"

"I thought you were going to fucking ready to summon demons to feast on my soul when you stormed out like that! I really thought you were mad! And suddenly it's all a joke to you?"

"Yeah I really was. I was so furious I could throw you into a shredding machine and still want to tear you apart."

I stare at her for a few seconds. . .

"Okay maybe the tearing apart thing was a bit too much, but still, I was so damn angry I could throw you off a cliff."

Like that makes it any different.

She continues, "But then again, I saw how well behaved you were, like the 'dog' you are and thought 'why not just let it go for now?' "

"What the heck is wrong with you woman?"

Sometimes I get the feeling that she's sent directly from the underworld. But I don't mention anything about it because her inner demons might come running out here, right now, at me.

"If you want to know what hell is wrong with me, then the answer to that is I don't exactly know. The only thing I'm sure of is the fact that you're one of the reasons I'm messed up."

"As. If." She sneers.

I disregard it for now and change the subject. Like that'll do us any better. "So why exactly were you mad?" I sigh in between and cross my fingers invisibly, "I tried asking but I guess you didn't get the message"

"Okay, okay I'm at fault for now, so what? Still want an answer?"

I replied with the most annoying silence.

"It's cause you were acting cool by yourself, you dimwit" She exhales heavily with her back slouched altogether.

"You --"

"Okay, now that that's over with Let me finish laughing" She wipes a tear as she tries to avoid looking like a drunkard laughing hysterically. It wasn't the most proper thing to do while walking on the street, but even as people walked pass by us, we didn't mind at all because I'm almost pretty much certain that it felt like we had the whole universe to ourselves. For a split second the world revolved around us, and only us.

It didn't last long though. Someone comes swinging out of nowhere and comes in between the connection, breaking it.

"What the fuck man!" I scream.

"Oi, Kim Taehyung. No one curses at Jungkook. My Jungkook" Her aura changes rapidly from the most virgin breeze to pure death.

I hate this.

I'm not sure why but every time Jungkook comes caving in like this, there's a really pissed off part of me deep down inside. I really don't understand why the universe makes us feel one way, and in a blink of an eye, another. Is it fun doing that when you're in control?

I look at them being all touchy with each other; arms linked, head rested on one's shoulder, and bodies which pressed against each other side by side.

"Whatever." I whisper under my breath as I pass them

"Taehyung! Where you going you idiot?" She asks

"None of your business Monkey face!"

At this moment, where envy is devouring my mind and soul, I could care less of what she might think of me, I just have this desperate urge to separate them or put walls in between them. Thinking about it, I don't even care what kind of trick has to be played as long as I can scrape that guy off of her, like literally.

For God's sake how did I turn out like this?

Once I turned around to check on them, they had already left me and the loneliness in my chest just gets colder. Why am I feeling so depressed like this? This isn't like me at all. Besides, I was the one who walked away in the first place so why the hell would I expect them to have stayed there. Since it's like this, I'll take a quick detour and head for the abandoned park a block past our home.

I depend on this place a lot when I feel so out of it. It's kind of like an escape route that separates you from the reality when you need to the most. Come to think of it, I've been visiting more often these days. I guess things just change when you start to dip your head into the ocean of understanding the not so understandable.

Looking back at my day, it was quite amusing in a very lively, confusing yet plausible, and horrid way. It was beyond my expectations and that's one way to live life. Though, another one is to be dominated by thoughts of her, which to be honest, is a life I've already been living for the past couple years now.

|e n d|