I lost you
How did that happen?
When did it happen?
We were best friends
We grew up together
We were my childhood best friends
But then tragedy struck
I moved away
And I barely ever saw you
Then you also moved away too
We saw each other even less
But then something happened
My dad said I had to go away for a while
I was moving again
But this time
I was going three hours away
To my grandparents house
I never saw you again
I didn't even get to say goodbye
We didn't speak for 6 years
When we both were 13
You found me on Facebook
You messaged me
And I messaged back
I felt whole again
I cried tears of happiness
I had always wondered
If you ever even missed me
You said you did
We talked constantly
We had much to catch up on
All was great
But what I didn't know then
Was that three years later...
You'd be taken from me
again
Only this was permanent
You can't come back!
Why did you leave me?
Why didn't you tell me?
Please come back
I need you
I can't have another person leave me
But you did
I was a call away!
A text away!
Why didn't you reach out for help?
Anxiety
Depression
Panic attacks
Self harm
Self doubt
Bullying
Being alone
Suicide
These define you
I never knew!
These are what took you away!
I promised you I was here
But you needed someone
Me
You needed me
And I wasn't there!
I'm sorry
I'm so sorry
I found out this morning
Three days after
Three days too late
Three days without a call
Three days without a text
I hadn't been worried
When I should have
Your Aunt delivered me the news
At 2 in the morning
She choke on the words
And I dropped my phone
I didn't believe her
But she said it was the truth
I didn't think you were capable
Of such an act
But I was wrong
Deeply wrong
I miss you already
She said you left me something
A letter
What did you write me?
Why didn't you just tell me?
After the call had ended
I couldn't sleep
I feel like I could breathe
I still went to school
Still went about my day
Like nothing was wrong
I did it for you
You'd want me to be strong
You used to tell me that all the time
Now I must greet
Your lifeless body
I know I will cry
I already have
I must watch as they put
You into the cold ground
This isn't what I want to happen
Why couldn't have I taken your place?
You had more to live for then I
It's not fair
But life isn't fair
So know your gone like the wind
I accept your fate
Or I'll try
For you are dead
And made of lead
In loving memory of :
Jackson Waters
February 28, 2000
-
June 1, 2016
~May we meet again, old friend~
~Katie~
