I am not a bad person
I'm 16
I can't do everything
I need help sometimes
I do the best I can
I get straight B's
I don't skip school
I do my homework
I don't do drugs
I don't drink
I don't sneak out
I don't have sex
I am a good person
Mom
Why do you treat me as if I am the worst daughter ever?
Why do you expect so much from me?
I'm 16 not 22
I wake up
Get ready for school
Walk to school
Get there on time....everyday
I go to my classes on time
I never cause trouble
I do the work the way I am told to
I put up with idiot kids and teachers
I even go to school when I'm sick
I come home
Let my dogs out
Do my laundry
Do my homework and projects
Make dinner
Take a shower
And study for tests
What more do you want from me?
I have nothing more to give to you!
And if that isn't good enough for you then......I'm sorry
You say:
"You are such a negative person!"
"You only think about yourself!!"
"You only care about yourself!"
"And I'm fucking sick of it!!"
If that's truly how you feel.....thanks for telling me
If that's what you think I am
Then you truly don't know me....
I do not hate you but you're pushing me too.
After everything you ruined for me with your alcoholism.
Yet I continue to keep giving you help and support
You have the nerve to say I only care about myself?
I moved in with you!
I gave up my best friends!
My school!
My life!
I turned my back on my father for you!
I betrayed my own dad
The person was there when you weren't
I stabbed him in the back
For you
I'll regret that for the rest of my life
And I hope dad will forgive me one day
I have made a decision
Once I'm 18 and done with school
I no longer want everyday contact with you.
I'll move out if I must
I don't care
I'll leave and never look back if you wish
I just NEED to get away from you
I will not waste my life as you have
I will not make the mistakes you did
Maybe this seems harsh
But others will not understand
I can no longer ignore it
For now I will nod and keep my mouth shut
For if I open my lips we only throw words
And yours are deadly
Mine are small and misunderstood
I don't raise my voice
U do
I'm not being disrespectful
Never have
I'm trying to be heard
You won't listen
Dad's mom was more of a mother to me then you.
But she's gone for a while now
And she isn't coming back
For she can't because she's trapped in Heaven 04/30/15
But least not get into that
You hated her anyway
And she hated you too.
So I keep quiet
But know under my skin
My blood is boiling mad
My eyes hold rage
And my body wants to throw a punch
I will forgive but never forget
I don't want you around my children
For you will not ruin their childhood as you did mine.
Don't apologize
Don't act like nothing happened
Don't make me look like the bad guy
I am doing the best I can!
Maybe we'll never have a relationship a mother and daughter should.
That thought no longer hurts my heart.
I've accepted it
And I hope you do the same.
~Katie~
