Family is suppose to build you up not break you down.
That statement hit me hard today.
Family
What even is that?
I don't think I'd know
Mine is well....broken
No one these days has a great home life
85% of parents are divorced
Mine are
Have been since 2008
I was 7
3 months away from 8
My mother
And her troubled past
Of drugs, alcohol and crappy parents
My dad and his strict up bringing
His four kids with another woman
His first divorce
But not his last
My parents have 19 years between them
My father becoming a grandfather
And then a dad again to me
My nephew is 6 months older than me
My eldest sister is 38
Get the picture yet?
I love my siblings
But we just don't have a bond
That siblings normally have
Because of our age difference
Mom drinking got bad
She wasn't coming home
For days or week's
Without a call
Dad didn't know what to do
He still had to work
I was too young to stay home
So
He took me from school
I remember
I was in lunch
Said I had a dentist appointment
I didn't
He took me to my grandparent's home
3 hours away
And
He didn't stay
I've never felt such
Pure fear
Like I did in that moment
Dad said he call
Every night at 7
He tried to
But sometimes
He'd forget or fall asleep
I'd cry and panic
Didn't hear from
Mom for over year
She called the house
But grandma wouldn't let me answer
I knew it was hear thoe
I had memorized her
Phone number
Nightmares
Plague me for a long time
One night she showed up
And tried to take me
Cops got called
I saw them take her away
In handcuffs
As she kicked and screamed
And smelt of liquor
Dad moved in finally
I'd never let him out of sight
Grandma said it wasn't normal
Dad said I'd out grow it
To this day
I call my dad twice a day.
I never out grew it
Finally I got contact with mom
The conversation was short
It was one I'd heard before
I had a little cousin
3 years younger
I was 8
He was 6
I had to watch him
His father wouldn't
And
Grandma simply couldn't keep up with him
I was more a parent then his mother or father
They didn't care.
We grew up together
As brother and sister
He had behavior problems in school
I don't know if he still does
He don't speak anymore
Mom moved to town
Thought they'd get together again
They didn't
While dad was away
My grandmother took care of me
She was my everything
She was my mom
I never got to tell her that
She's died
April 30, 2015
She took her last breath
I had only been 15 for a month and four days.
Dad and I didn't speak after the funeral
Dad and I found our own place when I was 11
And we're still there
Mom moved to the next town over
About 20 minutes away
She got into trouble again
Her boyfriend was a heavy drinker
And turned out to be abusive too
I was 13 when I saw him slap her for the first time.
14 when I finally hit him to get him off her
13 the first time I got jumped
14 when I started carrying a blade
15 I became depressed
13 smoked my first cigarette
14 so frustrated I pushed a locker til my knuckles were bloody
13 saw my friend get shot by another friend
15 decided to move in with my mom
16 I regret that decision
13 went to my first party
15 I found the love of my life 2/24/16
13 started raising two little boys
16 still raising my son's
13 got my first job
16 I have two jobs
16 a junior in high school
This is MY story.
And
It's not over yet.
~Katie~
