I'll Show You

Chapter seven

It was silent on the way back home. Too silent. Justin laid back in the seat with his beanie covering his eyes so he could sleep or think whatever the hell he is doing.

I stared out of the window and thought about what I wanted at that moment. I wanted nothing more but to be happy, and Justin makes me happy in many ways, but I don't know if I want him to make me happy in any kind of way except for friendship. I have so much love for him, but... As I get to know him more and more... I really just don't want to ruin what we have because what we have right now is special to me.

I love that he can be himself around me and I really really love that he likes me... I mean damn that flatters the fuck out of me, but it's such a hard decision to make because I don't want to get caught up in the fame. Justin is famous so if I date him of course I'm going to be in the spotlight with him and I don't know if I am ready for that big of a change. I can hardly handle Justin's fans without going psycho on them... I don't know what I'm going to do about the paparazzi if I were to decide to give dating Justin a try. If the paparazzi gets in my face or his I'll tell you one damn thing, their cameras are going into the ground. Nuff said about that.

I don't know what to do. I mean it's just too soon to make such a big move. I grew up out of the spotlight, but Justin has only had a slight taste of normal. His normal is going outside and being screamed at and followed by girls everywhere. It gets tiring. I can understand that completely. I just don't know if I want that to be my new normal just yet.

It scares the fuck out of me honestly.

Justin notices I'm still awake and haven't moved a muscle since we boarded back onto the plane. He rubs his eyes and let's out a yawn.

"You okay?" He asked in his sexy raspy voice. God... That might change my mind all together.

I glance at him for just a second and then look down at my feet.

"I suppose. I'm just thinking." I say twiddling my thumbs.

Justin nodded and grabbed his water bottle that sat next to him.

"You want to talk about it?" He asked and then took a swallow out of the bottle.

I heaved a sigh and trailed my tongue along my chapped lips.

"Sure." I responded trying to hide the fact that I didn't really want to talk about it.

"Alright I'm listening." He said putting all of his focus on me. Wow... His eyes are-- damn it sorry.

"Well... I've been thinking about what you said and... I honestly don't know what to do. It's like I really want to and then there are the consequences that are making it hard for me to choose. I don't know if I could handle the paparazzi in my face all the time or screaming fans running up to me. I grew up out of the spotlight and you grew up in it, so you're use to it. Justin, I want nothing more but to be happy and for you to be happy. Just please consider giving me more time to think about this."

Justin rubs the back of his neck and chews on the inside of his lip.

"Chris, I understand. I really do, you are normal and what you have is something that I want and I will never have. I'm glad you were honest with me. Maybe... For right now it's best we just stay friends and maybe in the long run... We can try to be more." He said understandingly.

Phew. That was easy.

"Thanks Justin, really means a lot that you understand." I smile at him and hug him from across the seat. I could feel his hands grip me tightly.

"No problem." He said placing my hair behind my ear. He really makes it hard on me damn. He does the shit on purpose and now that he knows that I might give it a chance... He is going to be a tease more than he already is.

I did it to myself.

Justin|

God, I can't help but stare at her as she sits in front of me so beautifully. Her hair is a mess and there is not one drop of make up on her face. How could she possibly not even try and just look so... Perfect.

Christina is so different from any girl that I have ever talked to. She doesn't take shit from anyone... Not even me. She is Independent and strong for her age and she is smart. She thinks things through before actually doing. By now... Any other girl would have thrown themselves at me, but... Not her.

She treats me normally like I'm not 'Justin Bieber pop singer sensation' and that's more that I could ever ask for.

I want to be respected as a person and she literally shows me that everyday. It kills me inside that I have to sit there and look at her and not be able to hold her how I want to.

I just want to kiss her lips all day, and run my fingers through her curls and lay her down gently. She is not just any other person to me. I just met her, but... She really just does something to me that I haven't felt in so long and fuck... It feels good.

If she ever does give me a chance, I will love her tenderly and so full until my heart gives out. I don't know if I am in love with her... or the feeling. I really do like her and I have this connection with her, but she gives me this feeling that no one has given me in a while.

I'm not use to having someone who treats me like she does...

I'm use to people fucking me over and using me for fame and money. That shit gets old real fucking quick. I also hate when people kiss my ass only because of who I am. I'm a human being not God people.

She makes me feel human inside and out. When I look at her... God her smile shines so bright and I can't help but smile back at her because her smile is so contagious.

She is smiling at me right now. I love to just look at her because I know deep down inside... It drives her crazy.

"Chris." I say getting her attention.

She looked over at me with her teeth lodged into her lip. As usual.

"What?" She says clearly.

I get lost in her eyes and lick my lips. Her lips curve into a smile as she waits for me to say what I was going to say.

"Nothing, just wanted to see your smile."

Her cheeks were red and I was the cause. It made me feel amazing that I could make her blush so hard.

Sometimes I feel like she is a fan of mine only because she told me that she got upset about me rejecting her. I wouldn't mind if she was my fan. If she were to be, then she is the realist one out there honestly.

Speaking of my fans...

My beliebers don't understand what I'm going through right now. My Twitter feed is filled with videos of me being pushed down from the other night and most of the responses were not good. They think I don't see what they say, but I see everything.

I love my fans. They are the reason why I am who I am today and I cannot thank them enough, but I'm so tired of hearing the same thing over and over again. Screaming, crying, complaining because I wouldn't take a picture.

Who needs a picture when you could literally have a conversation with me... I know what it feels like to be inspired by someone. Hell, I was rejected by usher the first time I met him. It's not easy being me and it's really hard for me to reject my fans and tell them
no, but... Right now I'm working on a new me and I know they will be happy in the end that I did.

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Hey guys! This is just a filler chapter. They suck I know, but enjoy. -Mae