Fascination - JB

Make Up (part two)

August 18th, 2016

*// damn! Y'all work fast lol

your POV

He kept calling my name- booming it actually. All I could hear was him roaring my name as my heart beat picked up faster ringing in my ear. I knew, I just knew I shouldn't have come. I wasn't nor am I ready to face him. I'm embarrassed to be seen around him, all I could think was when he left and never came back. Never called. Never answered my messages.

My hand stings like little needles pricking all of the nerves in my palm.

I get to my car and start it up. "Y/n," he knocks on the window, "Y/n open the door. Don't be ridiculous." I scoffed before revving the engine, putting into drive and sped off down the streets away from him. I looked in the rear view mirror as his figure got smaller and smaller. I sigh, relieved that he wasn't following me. I felt the need to scream. The ache in my chest and the curls flipping in my stomach- I felt like I was going to hurl.

I don't think I would have handled it any better than I did. You should have seen the look on his face. It was hurt - aside from me actually smacking him - like his emotion was nearly emotionless. He had no expression... As if he's the one who got ran out on. He looked apologetic after I smacked the living daylights out of him. He muttered a low I deserved that and boy did I want to keep hitting him but I couldn't find the strength to. So I took off to save myself the embarrassment.

I just ran away from Justin Bieber.

"Never underestimate a man's ability to make you feel like the guilty one,"

And boy did I. I really fucked myself with that.

Returning home, I parked in the garage. Getting inside the house, I was full on in hysterics. Tears rivered down my cheeks along with mascara and eyliner smudging around my pathetic weaping eyes. My body fell limp as soon as I made it to the couch.

Esther, Phil and Todd came out of no where, all whimpering and giving me puppy kisses. I smiled weakly, "hey guys." I leaned down from my position to give the babies some love.

I've sat here on the couch, dazed as the scene just replays in my mind.

The emptiness in his eyes. The quiver in his bottom lip, as if he were going to start crying. He didn't have that shimmer glow in his eyes; the happy Justin had a sparkle in his hazel honey orbs. This Justin had no emotion. Just dead, exhausted, no shimmer shiny eyes. He definitely didn't seem hisself. But, I could've sworn I saw a tiny bit of hope, a small sliver of hope in his eyes as soon as I turned to look at him.

It was gone the second he realized what I was doing before I did it myself. Slapping him.

I could have handled it better. I really should have handled it a lot better. But I was and still am hurt. I have a reason to be angry. I have a reason to be sad and hurt. He- I don't know why he was acting the way he was. I couldn't puzzle it together. And maybe if I actually had stayed and listened, I'd know what he had to say.

NO! I can't feel guilty! I shouldn't feel guilty at all for his actions. I mean, yeah. I shouldn't have slapped him. That was over dramatic and childish in a way...

Jesus Christ! Get a hold of yourself Y/n!

A couple of faded knocks on the front door startled me. I ignored them and turned on the security cameras. It was Justin at the front door. Go figure... His hand slipped inside his pockets for a few seconds. He knocked again. "Y/n, I know you're in there. I know you see me." He looks up at the camera in the corner of the high ceiling. I stare into the screen, seeing that his eyes are puffy and his lips swollen. Has he been crying?? After a subtle moment he spoke again, "if you don't open up, I'll force myself in. I have the other key, remember?"