Ana wasn't here to hang out with me before school because she had flags for ROTC or something. Andy for here around 7:40 ish, which was cool because I was alone. A couple minutes before the bell rang we walked up to the second floor, because I had history.
We hung out until the bell rang and he had to leave. When he did, I stood up to give him a hug. While we were hugging, he turned his face and kissed me. And it was a pretty public thing too. There were quite a few people around which I'm a little worried about. But I kind of really don't care anymore.
As long as my parents don't find out, I don't care. And I feel like such a terrible child for saying this. The system that my parents raised me by was based on trust. And here I am, keeping secrets.
The fool I'll be when this comes crashing down on me. I'm so afraid this is going to go all wrong and he'll leave me. I'm going to be such a fool when he leaves me and I'll have lost all trust and respect from my parents. It's going to hurt. I'm not sure if I'm ready for the pain.
We saw each other after school today. I love it when he hugs me from the behind, the only problem is that I really suck at walking when he's hugging me. I'd much rather set all of my crap down and just stand and be hugged, but I'll take what I can get.
We walked to Von's today, and when mom got here she called me. I spotted her car when we were walking through the lot and stopped, but he didn't realize and kept walking. I kind of whisper-yelled at him and he turned around and stopped out of her line of sight. I motioned for him to come closer, closer, closer, until he was right next to me. Then I kissed him. I had to, I couldn't help it. I crave kissing him all of the time.
I seriously need to learn how to kiss though. It's hard to kiss someone if you don't even know how to kiss. I'm hoping I'll learn with practice, maybe. I always feel really bad because I know I really suck at kissing. But I kiss him anyway.
During the kiss, he seemed almost paranoid. Every time a car would drive by, he would be like, "I think that was your mom," and I was just going, "I don't care."
YOU ARE READING
Evolution
Non-FictionThere are a lot of things you don't really think about until they happen to you. Take rape, for instance. I always thought, "That won't happen to me. I have a boyfriend. I trust him. He would never take advantage of me like that..." I couldn't have...
