Turn Away | c.h

Chapter 42 - You Remain

(unedited - sorry for any mistakes, I'll come back and edit at a later date)

I stared out at the lights, my arms wrapped around myself as Calum glanced over at me. There was a fair distance between us, which was unusual to say the least. We were constantly touching each other all the time, his hands were either resting on me or my head rested upon his shoulder. But now, we'd both made a conscious effort to save a gap between us which made me feel beyond uncomfortable.

Silence was all around us as we looked at the city in front of us. We were in my secret hide out that I'd shown him the first time we explored the city together. It made me realise how much had changed in those couple of months, how many decisions were made and how many differences were ignored. Mostly, how many sacrifices we'd made for each other.

"Stella?" Calum's soft voice broke the silence. I glanced to him, giving him a soft nod. "Are you mad?"

I fumbled on the question, looking out at the lights as I really thought about it in my head. I wasn't mad- I was just upset that he felt the need to hit Michael, and start up something with Chet. I know he was just trying to defend me- us- but it was distressing to see, to say the least.

"No." I mumbled, shaking my head. Calum continued to stare at me, his brown eyes searching mine.

"You won't even look at me." He stated, shaking his head as I tried to keep all my feelings bottled up tight. I had no real reason to be upset at Calum for defending us, but I couldn't control what was going on inside of me. I was upset, and not even his beautiful brown eyes could sway me otherwise.

"And that determines if I'm mad or not?"

"Stella, come on." He softly said, moving closer to me finally. "Tell me what's wrong."

I unfolded my arms, turning to look at Calum. His eyebrows were slightly furrowed, he looked somewhat distressed from the conversation.

"You didn't need to hit him." I simply said, watching as he slouched back, eyes softening. I could tell he thought I was overreacting- I knew those eyes more than anything.

"He called you a whore, of course I was giving him what he deserved."

"But you didn't need to hurt him Calum, he's just a dumb teenager who was trying to provoke a reaction out of you." I said, watching as he raised his eyebrows.

"A dumb teenager who's best friends with the guy who tried to rape you."

My mouth closed as I stared at him, the look on Chet's face returning in my mind. The way he looked on top of me, the way his blue eyes kept staring into mine as if he was forever forcing his presence inside of me.

I shook my head, dismissing the thoughts from my mind.

"B-but still. You didn't need to hurt Michael." I quietly spoke, returning back to the point. Calum scoffed, leaning back in the palm of his hands.

"I'm going to continue doing whatever I want in order to protect you." He said, certainty laced in his voice. I couldn't help but roll my eyes.

"Protect me," I mumbled. "How was, in any way, punching Michael protecting me? He worked you up and you gave him a reaction. My life wasn't on the line, Calum. You wanted to hurt him." I said, looking back at him. Calum's eyes were glowing as per usual, his hair pushed up in several directions as he looked at me, baffled.

"Just admit it." I said, trying to will a reaction from him. I wanted to see if the fire would light behind his eyes. I wanted to see if I could work him up the same way Michael and Chet had, just to prove my point. But he remained silenced, and it was one of the most agonising silences I had ever endured.