The R Word (On Hold)

Chapter 2 - Life Goes On

Darkness surrounded Jane. Leaves, crusty and aged, formed a carpet underneath her. Dirt buried itself under her fingernails. A shadow, his shadow rushed towards her, horrid hands outstretched and eager for the touch of her skin. Jane leapt to her feet and turned to run, but she moved in slow motion. Her feet, heavy and bound to the earth like roots of a tree forbid her to move, to escape. His shadow hands grasped her neck from behind and squeezed.

Jane woke screaming. Her body launched forward, gasping and shivering violently. She looked around anxiously. 

He's gone, she told herself, it was just another nightmare.

Shaking, Jane placed a sweaty hand around her neck, where his hands had been, and massaged the goosebumps until they faded. When her heart rate ran it’s even pace once more, Jane glanced over at her bedside clock. 
5:38am

Going back to sleep wasn't an option. Her body was too awake, too alert. So flying back her duvet, Jane walked to her window and rolling back her blind, her body became bathed in gentle sunlight. Relief washed over her, like an avalanche. The world was bright and wonderful. There was no danger, no darkness. Jane felt her demons retreat to the box in the furthest reaches of her mind. The latch snapped shut, the chains locked around it tightly. Jane breathed in deeply and let it out easy.

For four months, she's been doing this. For four months, she's been fighting the shadows; trying to live her life as if nothing had happened. 
But it did, the voice in her mind told her. He never let her forget. 

For a time, people were sympathetic to the girl attacked by rabid foxes. Or that's the conclusion they came to. Jane told them nothing about what happened to her. She claimed amnesia and exhaustion. Reporters trailed her for weeks, trying to get an interview about her ordeal. But her parents (the Saints) and Alfie kept them at bay, long enough for them to lose interest. In time, everyone forgot about Jane and her ordeal. But Jane hadn’t.

This wasn't something she could ignore. It was etched on her memory like a brand and it burned hotter and hotter with every nightmare her brain created to torment her. This wasn't something she could forget, regardless of how much she wanted to. All she could do was live each day at a time and hope the visions fade. When she was around Alfie and Danielle, the demons kept their distance. She was happy, deliriously so. But when she was alone, they wreaked havoc like a past time. Enough so, that her mother once found Jane curled up underneath her bed with a teddy bear, sucking her thumb.

Those days were behind her. She couldn't let this rule her life. She had to live, if not for herself but for Alfie and their future together. Then there was Danielle. She couldn't afford to lose her best friend, not for anything or anyone. 

Straightening her back, Jane turned from the window and went to shower; her mother  then waking to the sound of her six o'clock alarm. She would live like nothing had happened. She would smile and tell her friends she was fine. She would ask after their parents and ask if they enjoyed their weekend. She would be a teenage girl, about to start college with her boyfriend and group of friends.

I will be fine, Jane told herself, letting the scorching hot water burn away the memory of her latest nightmare. 

Life goes on for most people.

Why not me?