Open Wounds | Captain Swan

10. Unforgivable Things

"I'm sorry." His gentle apology echoed through the quiet room. They had been lying in the same position for what seemed like hours, but appeared to be minutes. He just couldn't keep it to himself anymore. Not after he realized the true damage of his behaviour.

The thought that she probably hadn't openly talked about the events that happened between her and his father crossed his mind, and made his heart drop.

He was the one person she blindly trusted. She was supposed to tell him all her problems. And when she needed him most, he wasn't truly there. Of course, he was physically, but mentally it was a whole different story.

"For what, my love?" The nicknames she had been giving him lately made his heart flutter. Like he was still that love-sick teenager he used to be when they just settled into their relationship, deep down he knew they would always slightly remain that way.

"When you told me, Albert forced unwanted things on you, all I did was yell at you." He admitted, his eyes slowly dropping all the way to the floor. "I can't imagine how awfully painful that must've been for you."

"It's fine, Killian." She assured him, touching his cheek so he would meet her eyes...with success. The forest and the ocean met once again. "You had every right to yell, I am the one who did unforgivable things."

"You see, that's the thing." He lifted his head from her chest so he could take a better look at her. He wanted to be able to see her entire face when he told her the news she unmistakably longed to hear from him ever since she laid eyes upon him again. "I forgive you for that. I did a long time ago." But there is something else I will never forgive you for. He wanted to add it so badly, at first, he intended to, but he couldn't shatter her heart after he had just repaired it again.

Her face lit up in the most adorable way. Killian let a short laugh escape his lips, feeling the pain burn in his ribs. But her face and the kisses he got peppered all over his face was worth it.

He had never prayed for visiting hours to be over so much when there was a knock on the door. None of the adults had said the magic words that allowed him to enter yet, but he was already inside. His eyes were puffy, like he had been crying, although Killian believed drugs was a better fitting solution to that 'problem'.

"What do you want?" Killian snapped, his grip on Emma absentmindedly tightening. She blushed when she detected it. He was probably the most overprotective boyfriend alive, but it was one of the many qualities she loved about him. In fact, she admired it. Most guys from his age would be ashamed to be so clingy (in a good way) and protecting their love, but Killian wasn't. Just like Killian wasn't most guys.

"I owe you an enormous apology." Emma tried to figure whether it was a bad or good thing she felt sorry for the man. He was showing regret and was willing to apologize. But that didn't take away the terrible - more like pathetic - things he had committed.

"We don't need your pity." Killian spitted the words out, like they were toxic and able to kill him within seconds. "I'd prefer a more detailed explanation for why you raped my girlfriend. I can live with the fact that you send several people to me and try to tear us apart. But you touched her, and with that you crossed a line. One you will never cross back."

"I'm suffering." Oh, you're suffering? Killian scoffed inside his skull as he tried his best to keep it between those walls. What happens in Killian's head stays in Killian's head. "From a mental illness. After that morning, I finally began to regain my common sense. I went to see a therapist for help and he referred me to this doctor, who diagnosed me with the illness. And because of it and my distrusting past, I don't always treat people fair. It's hard to explain, but I hope you understand."

"And you think that just makes up for every awful thing you've ever done?" Killian asked sarcastically. He didn't care if he was being an arrogant arse, Albert deserved every part of it. Despite his mental illness, which Killian was very doubtful over.

Emma squeezed his hand, sending silent signals to his brain. "Look, what he is trying to tell you is that we are truly sorry about your illness, but the things you did, the wounds, are just too fresh to be filled with forgiveness."

"I understand. I know my suffering isn't an excuse for every awful thing I've ever done. But I wanted you to be aware of it, and that I'm trying to fight it the best I can...for you two." He approached Emma and handed her a piece of paper. She flinched at his touch as the memories of his hands everywhere drifted into her mind. Killian growled at Albert and Emma kicked his leg under the blankets, signalling for him to stop acting like a child that didn't get his Cookie. "I do hope to see you again." Were his last words until he disappeared into the white, light halls of the hospital.

"Now that we're alone." He grinned, taking Emma into his arms even though it was rather uncomfortable for him. His Swan hadn't been safely locked into his embrace for far too long.

Their long-lasting hug soon turned into a passionate kiss when he couldn't fight the urge to crash his lips onto hers anymore. During the year, he spent thinking she was taken from him forever he never forgot the taste of her lips. He found himself forgetting what her voice was like, her serval face expressions looked like. What she felt like to touch, which they barely did. But her lips never failed to remain perfectly in his mind.

Soon Emma crawled on top of him. Her torso over his as her legs still stayed beside his, but slightly tangled up with his. His hands rested on her lower back, keeping her just where he liked it.

"Oh god," A sweet voice came from behind them. Emma immediately climbed off him and sat on her chair. " I can come back later." She awkwardly suggested as she stayed glued to the floor.

"No, it's fine." Emma encouraged her to continue. After all, she had her reasons to barge into the room. "We shouldn't be doing that anyway, with his injuries."

She nodded awkwardly as the blush on her cheek bones never faded. "It's fine though. If it doesn't hurt him too much." She refreshed the blood and injected another liquid into his system.

"I think we have a problem there." Because he is never going to confess the pain." She teased him a bit. It was the truth though, Killian would never turn down an opportunity to kiss her.

"You're just too irresistible, Swan." He wriggled his eyebrows in a way that made her whole-body shiver with desire for him. He was the irresistible one while doing such movement.

She saw the doctor, or nurse - whatever she was - smirk as she attempted to hide it with her hair, but failed.

She walked to the edge of the bed, where the greenish blanket was tucked into the bed and grabbed his file. She filled in a few things, such as the time and test results.

"We'll do an MRI tomorrow to see how the cartilage on your ribs is doing, but for now we'll just let you rest." She placed the file back and tucked the pen back into her pocket. "I'm Dr. Cameron by the way." She shook hands with the couple. "But most people call me Jen. I'm on House his team."

"Oh him," Emma chuckled, knowing it annoyed Killian because he hated the guy. "He seems slightly...different?"

Jen laughed. "He's the most arrogant, sarcastic arse you'll ever meet. But we all love him for it and, he's an amazing doctor."