Turning Back..

Chapter 19

I soon found myself sat in the passenger seat of Jaime's car, we were driving back to his house in silence, not even the radio was on. I lent my head on the cushion of the seat and just looked out of the passenger window as the houses sped by, we were only a couple of blocks away from Jaime's now. The car came to a slow stop as we pulled up on Jaime's drive and I rolled my head towards him "Are you ok?" I nodded but then changed my mind, what was the point in lying "No I'm not really" he sighed and pulled the keys out of the ignition "I know what will cheer you up" I raised an eyebrow at him as he got out of the car, I followed him and we walked up and into his apartment. I followed him into the kitchen and sat at the breakfast bar as he rooted through the cupboards "They were in here somewhere" he whispered "Aha" he turned around holding two packets of Reece's cups 

"Aw Hime!" he threw me one of the bags and I opened it instantly "How did you know I liked these?" he laughed "who doesn't like peanut butter cups? Come on we will go watch a film in the living room" I smiled and followed Jaime out of the kitchen and down the hallway to the living room. Jaime searched through his DVD's "How does A bugs life sound?" I smirked at him 

"Are you kidding me? A Bugs Life?" I thought about it for a moment and to be honest I wasn't even bothered what film he put on "Sure that's fine. I haven't seen it in a long time anyway" I watched as he put the Tv on and placed the disk into the DVD drive. I was lying down on my back taking up the whole sofa "hey move up please?" I groaned

"No i'm comfy here" he smiled at me "You can squeeze in behind" he lifted up my feet and laid beside me "Aw, look at your little bump" I turned to face him as his hand gently rubbed my tummy. I wanted to speak to Jaime about what we were going to do "Jaime, we need to talk about what we are going to do, times running out and we need to start sorting stuff ready for the arrival" Jaime swallowed "It's all happening so fast, I don't even know if I'm ready for this" I sighed 

"Jaime there is nothing we can do! We have 4 months" I turned back around so that I was facing the TV. I spent most of the film thinking every now and then Jaime would laugh at something and I'd snap out of my thoughts for a bit but soon I'd slip back into them. Eventually I spoke "Jaime?" 

"Hmmm?" I swallowed the lump in my throat and didn't bother to turn around to ask him what I wanted to ask, I didn't want to see his reaction "You still love me right?" I felt him tense up behind me and I shut my eyes waiting for a reply "Of course I do" I let out a sigh and turned to face him again as the end credits came on. He was smiling at me "Ok, I-I want to make us work Hime" he sighed at grabbed my cheeks in his hands "Don't force yourself to love me Deven, if you don't you don't" I closed my eyes

"No, but I could learn, I just want our child to have the best life possible, I don't want him or her to have to grow up with a broken family" Jaime smiled 

"We'll be ok Dev. Look you've just broke up with your husband, just don't rush into things, wait it out alright?" I nodded at him and sat up

"I think I'm going to head to bed" he nodded

"Ok, sleep well" I smiled at him as I stood in the middle of his living room before going over to him and placing a soft kiss on his lips. I'm not sure why I did it, I just wanted to feel something, some kind of connection but there was nothing, not even a little spark. "Night Hime" I stated simply before heading across the hallway to the spare bedroom.

That night I hardly got any sleep because my mind was racing with all of these thoughts. Mainly about Vic and how I was going to go on without him. Even if I did manage to, he would always be a part of my life because Jaime was a member of Pierce The Veil and his child was going to want to spend time with their father on the road or at shows. I rolled onto my side and looked at the clock as it approached 3am, I sat up and swung my legs around to the side of the bed before climbing out and grabbing a dressing gown which hung on the back of the door and placing it on. I walked down the hallway and pushed Jaime's bedroom door open slowly as there was no doubt that he would be asleep I closed the door and tiptoed over to the bed, climbing in next to Jaime, he stirred and I let my head hit the pillow. Jaime's arm suddenly wrapped around my waist and I was pulled closer into his chest as he placed tiny kisses in between my shoulder blades and I eventually fell asleep, not feeling so alone now. 

When I woke up the next morning and rolled over Jaime wasn't there, I sighed and slipped out of the bed, I needed to go and pick up my car from Kacie's. I went into my room and got changed and ready before going to find Jaime in the kitchen "Good Morning" he greeted me as I sat down at the breakfast bar. "Hi, I'm sorry if I disturbed you last night" Jaime turned away from the eggs he was cooking "It's fine honestly" I shook my head 

"I need to go get my car from Kacie's" I stated as I rose from my seat 

"Well, I'll nip you over after breakfast" I sat back down and placed my head on the table "Deven, sit up I made you an omelette" I lifted my head as Jaime slid the plate in front of me and sat opposite me. I grabbed the knife and fork and we both ate in silence, not a word was exchanged throughout breakfast, the only sound either of us were making was the scratch of our knife's and fork's on the plates. After breakfast I waited at the breakfast bar whilst Jaime showered. I decided to send Kacie a text saying that I was coming over shortly to fetch my car, she didn't reply but I just presumed she was still in bed seeing as last night was a late one and me and Jaime left way before they did. Jaime walked into the kitchen and stood in the doorway "Are you ready?" I stood up and grabbed my phone and keys before following him out to his car.

I was hoping my car would be on the drive where I had left it and could just get in it and go but unfortunately for me it was locked away in their garage. I knocked on the front door and waited anxiously hoping that Kacie would answer and not Mike but obviously nothing goes my way. I looked up at Mike as he pulled the door open, he looked behind him at someone before looking back at me "What do you want?" I looked down at the floor "If you are here to see Kacie she's not in, she got called into work" I sighed as Jaime appeared next to me. I wish he had just stayed in his god damn car like I asked him to. I looked back at Mike "I haven't come over to see Kacie, I came over to fetch my car which you inconveniently locked away in your garage" Mike sighed and opened the door wider for me and Jaime to go inside. I stepped into the hallway only to see Vic stood there holding Marie "Hi" I stated, I hated that my heart still raced when I was put in front of him. But the last thing I wanted was to avoid him, I wanted to remain at least friends... If that would even be possible. I'd accepted the fact that he would always be a part of my life even if I did just want to run and get away from everything. Vic didn't even answer he just turned away and started talking to Marie. I rolled my eyes and walked behind him into the kitchen, when he stood still against the kitchen counter I continued to walk towards the back door that lead to the garage. I went through the door, closing it behind me. Mike had already opened up the garage door so I could drive out, he was stood at the foot of the garage with his arms folded over his chest impatiently. I got into the car and drove out not even bothering to stop when I got on the driveway, I just took a left turn onto the road and decided to drive into town, I just had to hope Jaime didn't follow me, but I was sure he wouldn't have left the house, I just needed some alone time. 

Jaime's POV--

Mike walked into the kitchen where I was stood talking to Vic "Deven's gone if you were wondering" I closed my eyes and sighed. I wish she would tell me where she was shooting off to instead of leaving me to chase her everywhere. "Well I'd better go find her" I began to walk out of the kitchen when Mike grabbed my shoulder "Don't chase her, she'll be alright, why don't you hang out with me and Vic today? We'll get Tony over too, it's been a while since we've all hung out alone as a band" 

"Yeah good thinking Mike" Vic announced "Only, Marie is probably going to have to join in" Mike chuckled "We'll drop her off at Mom and Dad's on our way to fetch Tony" Mike announced as he placed his phone to his ear. I smiled glad that no one was really mad at me anymore.. Although there was this niggling feeling in the pit of my stomach that I should really go find Deven and make sure she was ok.. She'd been acting strange since last night. Maybe it was her hormones playing up. One minute she doesn't want to be alone and couldn't get to sleep until she was curled up next to me and now it's like she can't get away from me quick enough. I pulled my phone out of my pocket and sent her a quick text. 

Jaime: I know you probably want to be alone right now and that's fine. I'm hanging with the guys today. If you need to get into the apartment there is a spare key in the postbox. You know the code to get into it. See you later x

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