She Rises

Chapter 42

Jace P.O.V.

I look over to see her asleep. She looks so peaceful and it's nice to see. She took a real blow mentally today. She may not admit it, but she is both mentally and physically drained. I can and can't believe Amber would go that far. As I was driving, I decided I just thought I would take her to the beach. It may sound cliché but, it's the middle of the afternoon on a weekday and it's probably not that crowded and she needs somewhere that's quiet and peaceful. With not a lot of people around. 20 minutes later we're finally there. Like I thought, it almost completely deserted. Maybe a few people here and there. I see a secluded spot a little further down and decided that's where we will go. I look over to shake my girl awake.

"Hey babe, we're here." I gently wake her up.

"Hmmm what?" She asks, sleepily.

"We're here at the beach. It's quiet and you need a break. Come on." I tell her.

With that I get out of the car and grab the blanket I always carry around with me. I open the door for her while she climbs out, still waking up. I don't want her stumbling so I decided to just pick her up and carry her down. As she starts to wake up, she really takes in where we are.

"The beach?" She asks?

"Yeah, I thought it would be nice to get away for a little bit. Plus, there aren't many people here." I wiggle my eyebrows at her. Hoping to get a smile.

She just looks at me and giggles and I get that smile.

"There's that beautiful smile I've been looking for all day." I give her a kiss on the forehead and she blushes. I just love her blush.

After walking for about 10 minutes, I find a secluded space and sit her and blanket down. It's quiet and all you hear is the ocean waves. It's peaceful and I can see the tension on her face ease off. I look over to her, she's just staring out at the water.

"Why did I do it?" She asks, not looking at me.

"What do you mean?" I ask her. I'm a little confused.

"Why did I do it? Why did I keep on smoking it? Why did I get into the car? WHY WAS I SO FUCKING SELFISH?" She yells that last part and then, she starts crying.

I hate seeing her cry, it's the worst feeling in the world. I mean, all you want to do is see your bf/or gf smile all the time. But, that's in a perfect world, and that will never happen. I just pull her into my lap and let her cry. I let her cry on my shoulder, I just want her to get it all out. There's nothing I can do but just let her cry. So, I sit there and hold her while she cries, while run my fingers through her hair. I don't know how long it has been, but she starts to calm down.

"I'm sorry." She looks at me, a look of shame on her face.

"Why are you, sorry love?" I ask her.

"I got your shirt all wet, and I just, I just, I don't know babe." She looks down, guilt on her face.

"Baby, there is nothing to be sorry for. You made a mistake, things happen, but the one thing is, your still here, and you know you made a mistake. So, no one is mad at you either. No one is disappointed either. We are all here for you though. Never forget that much. Your friends and your family, we're all here. We all love you too." I tell her.

"Thank you. I really needed to hear that. You have no idea how much I thought everyone was disappointed in me. Especially you." She looks at me. I can see that she is worried.

"Love, I am not disappointed in you. I'm not mad or anything. I'm just glad you are here now. I'm never letting you go. No matter what, I will always fight for you. I love you." She gives me a smile and I lean down and kiss her. When I pull away, I look down at her and she pulls me back down and crashes her lips to mine. Kissing me like she will never see me again. I don't know how long we're kissing but next thing I know, she is on top of me. She is taking control and honestly, it's a big turn on. She pulls back for air and looks at me. Like she is searching for something. I give her a smile and she's back to kissing me. She runs her tongue over my bottom lip, asking permission. As soon as I open, she is taking over, and I let her. I'm getting turned on and I can feel it, but, this is all her. And, I'm not a virgin, that's for sure. I don't want to do anything but kiss her right now. No matter how much my body wants to, mentally, I know we are both not ready.

"Mmm Jace." She moans, trying to take my shirt off.

"Baby, no." I stop her and she looks up.

"What, why?" She asks a little disappointed.

"Your body may be telling you that you want to, we're both not ready, and we know that. I know that you are going through some things, and I'm here for you. You may think you want this now to get your mind off of it. But, I know you, and you're not ready. We both know that. I love you but, not yet." I hoist her off of me and lay her on her side. Putting her head on my chest, while I play with her hair.

"But babe, I can tell you want it." She says.

"Baby, my body wants it. I mean, I do want it, but not yet. I don't want to get ahead of ourselves. And like I said, I know you don't either." I tell her.

It's silent for a few minutes, just listening to our heartbeats. It's not a bad silent either. A few minutes later, she finally speaks up.

"You're right Jace. I just think my emotions were getting the best of me. I'm sorry I'm not ready." She blushes.

I can't help but chuckle a little and look down at her reddening cheeks. She gives me a small glare.

"What are you laughing at?" She gives me a pointed look.

"I told you, I wasn't ready either." I smile and kiss her cheek.

"Oh, yeah, you did." She looks down.

"Don't worry love. We'll be ok. We'll make it through. I promise you that." I tell her and play with her hair some more.

"You just relax, I will wake you up when it's time to go." I look down at her, to see she has already fallen asleep. I love this girl so much. I don't know what I would do without her.

Oi Oi loves. 2 updates at once. I'm on a role haha. I'll try and have another one up tomorrow.

So, how do you feel about this chapter?

How do you feel about Jace wanting to take things slow and stopping her?

Well, have a good one lovelies.

Love you all!