Destined To Kill

CHAPTER 8

The whole school hours were a total havoc. Everyone was so excited. Well who wouldn't if the world's baddest bully died. I was anyway.

I had not been bothered by anyone today. The whole gang of Ben's did not come today and the others just ignored me.

It was the weirdest feeling ever. I was scared, at the same time it felt good to just finish someone. It made me feel powerful and not hopeless for the first time in a year.

The best feeling was the one of freedom. At last I did something I really want to. Ryan's death is avenged. Justice was served and all the bonds released except one.

I felt like I owed one to David. Though he insisted that he did this to free himself from the guilt I didn't feel convinced. I want to pay him back. Of course not with money because that would mean to give all we had and even more.

Ever since Ben died I have been thinking of one possibility. One really reckless idea. I have been toying with that idea the whole day. It was a great dilemma.

By the lunch the school decided it was no use on continuing the day after this so they said us to leave.

I didn't go to house. Instead I went to sit on the nearby park. First I sat on the bench for fifteen minutes staring at nowhere. Then got up and started to run.

This running brought back a lot of memories. Ryan used drag me out of the house in the early morning to do his weight loss exercises with him here. At first I was reluctant. Then I found out that running cleared my head. Hope it helps me now too.

I know I'm stupid even to consider the plan. It was too risky. But it felt right. I can do that.

But the possibilities of the major risk made me uneasy. It wasn't going to be an easy road. It will be a bumpy ride.

I paused breathing heavily. I slumped on the bench closing my eyes. I considered the various possibilities. One I don't go. Stay here enjoy the peace. All great and without problems. Two go there. Face all the problems and risks. The great great risk.

But still all I can do was be confused. I cannot understand my new rebellious thoughts. My new aversion from my usual things. I cannot understand these changes or get used to it. It's as great as it is frightening.

It's like watching a movie. A really normal person will suddenly break bad. It's so dramatic. Except it's too real. Happening to me. I know that break is not far enough. Now it's only up to me to decide what will be the outcome. But there are no two extremes. Only two versions of the same future.

I took up my backpack and went outside the park. I decided to make the decisions later. I want to get to home before Myra comes. She is really confused since Ben died. I don't want to give her any more reason to get suspicious.

The weather was really beautiful. The walk back was pleasant. I walked slowly in the almost deserted streets. It wasn't far to home from here. Just a few blocks.

There was only a girl walking few feet in front of me. She wearing headphones and walking slowly like me. For no reason I was staring at her. Thinking how life would be better if I had been as pretty as her. First Ryan wouldn't have died. We wouldn't have been bullied.

Suddenly the man behind me moved forward faster crossing me. Now he was on par with the girl. I saw as he deftly put his hands in her jean pockets and took out her wallet.

He continued forward swiftly transferring the wallet to his jacket pocket.

I paused on my tracks. Now only not confused. I turned to the opposite direction and walked faster. Soon I came to a main road. There I called out for a taxi.

I gave the driver the address to the David took me to.

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