Where I belong.

Part 24 - Jealous John

Being at work felt different this time. I was happier. I was glowing. I just couldn't hide my happiness. I was in John's office sorting his paper work out. He hadn't said a single word to me today. He had walked in and out of his office without uttering a single sound. I, too , didn't initiate a conversation.

It was time for lunch. He walked out and didn't say anything to me. I also walked out to go and have lunch.

We returned from lunch and carried on working in silence. Funny enough we both broke the silence at the same time.

"Sorry you can talk first." I said.
"No no, ladies first. Say what was on your mind."
"The silent treatment ,John."
"What about it?"
"It's a bit awkward. I thought we were close friends. What happened?"
"Nothing."
"Well it doesn't seem like nothing. Who hurt you? You know you can always talk to me."
"I prefer to not say anything."

He walked out on me and I ran after him. As if that was bad, Charlotte witnessed all of this.

"John,wait."

He stopped and turned to look at me.

"John. I don't know what upset you but if I did anything wrong like mess up your meetings or something, please let me know."
"Let's go out for dinner. Tonight."
"Excuse me?"
"I'm picking you up. Be ready at 7"

He left me hanging there.

Charlotte wasn't going to let this slip.

"Aren't happily engaged are we?"
"Get away from me Charlotte."
"You heard the playa, you've got a dinner date. How are you going to explain that to your fiancé?"
"Get out of my way."

I pushed Charlotte out of my way and walked back to the office.

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"Baby don't forget I have a late meeting with Mr. Smith" I said from the bathroom.
"Don't be home too late." Bandz said.
"Baby you know these meetings go on longer than expected. I will call you though." I kissed his forehead when I walked out of the bathroom.
There was a knock at the door.
"I will get it." Said Grandma.
"Don't worry about it. It's probably my boss. He's picking me up."
"Oh." My grandmother gave a concerned look.

I opened the door.
"Mr. Smith, you made it. Meet my grandmother and you already know my fiancé."
"Grandma? She looks like your sister." said John.

My grandmother became a bit flattered "oh no dear I'm far too old for that."
"Well you look good grandma. Don't worry she will be back on time. You ready to go?" He asked me.
"Yes sir." I replied.
I kissed grandma on the forehead and Bandz on the lips.

John and I walked to his Mercedes and we left.
He took me to an awfully fancy restaurant. We were ushered to our seats and got comfortable with a bottle of champagne.

"John, honestly. Why did you want me here?"
"I needed to clear the air with you."
I remained silent with a confused look on my face. He then continued.
"There is nothing going on between me and you, Miss Palmer."
"Is that why you brought me here? To tell me that?"
"Yes...you've been throwing hints at me. Hints that you may want me."
"Want you?" I was confused.
"Yes. I need you to understand what we have is strictly professional."
"Okay.  You've cleared the air now can you take me home to my man."
"Excuse me?"
"Take me home to my fiancé the man who is about to marry me!"

John slammed his table "Damnit, Gwen! Why are you so asleep? When are you going to wake up! I want you Gwen! I need you! I'm in love with you!"

People around us stared.

I was shocked. My face was flushed. I stared at him with tears eyes and whispered "Take me home to my man."
"Fine. If you believe that man can make you happy then go."
"Then go? Go, John? You brought me here!"
"Here's some money. Take a cab and go."

He put money on the table, got up and left for the men's room. I took the money and left. I walked a short distance hoping to find a taxi. Suddenly I heard thunder. "Oh my goodness, no." I whispered.

I searched in my handbag for the money but couldn't find it. Turns out I may have dropped it. It started pouring rain and I was stranded.
I had no choice but to walk. After all, I am used to walking.

While I was walking , a car slowed down. "Dear God, I don't need a stranger offering to take me home." I said to myself.

"Gwen, I'm sorry."
I turned to look. It was John. I carried on walking.
"Gwen, please."
I said nothing. I just continued walking.
"Gwen, truth is I'm bipolar."
I froze, stopped walking and stared at him.
"You're what?"
"I'm bipolar but I know what I'm feeling for you is real. I just get so frustrated when you don't see that. Now please. Come in let me take you home."
I waited and contemplated for a while but after that I agreed.
"Oh okay." I sighed with tears in my eyes.

It was a silent journey.  When we got outside my house, I couldn't come out. I turned to look at him.
"John..." I said
"Gwen..."

I shook my head and slowly walked out of the car.  When I got to my door, I turned to look at him. He was still there , in the car, staring at me. I was really wet, I wonder if he could see my tears.

I walked in and got such a fright when I saw grandmama sitting at the kitchen table knitting.

"Grandma? Shouldn't you be asleep?"
"I couldn't sleep dear."
"You didn't have to wait up for me."
"What an awfully late time to come back from a meeting."
"I didn't keep track of time." I looked down, and whispered with the guiltiest of consciences.
"He's asleep. Don't worry. Don't wake him."

There was awkward silence.

"Goodnight grandma." I slowly walked to my bedroom.

There he lay. So innocent. Why was I doing this to my man? I went into the bathroom to dry up. My hair was curled up from all the water. I changed into a dry nightdress and heard my fiancé ask
"How was the meeting baby?"
"Busy and hectic as usual."
"I'm glad you're home safe. Come to bed."

I slipped into the covers but didn't face him. I couldn't face him. He isn't supposed to see the tears falling from my cheeks.