Poetic Excuses

My Loyalty, Love, and Emotions

My loyalty is treated like a joke,
It is tested like a dog's love to an old friend.
It is thrown around like a basketball,
No one knows where it will end up but the player.

I try to give my loyalty to someone I think I can trust and love,
Only for it to be thrown into a wood chipper.
I thought I was smart enough to keep myself safe from the world,
But I was too dumb to see the monsters behind the floral masks.
My loyalty was given...
But wasn't received.

My love for someone or something is always broken,
When I try to glue it back together it never ends up the same like an old vase.
It is given to those I believe I can trust,
Only to be thrown to my face and put me on square one.

I give love to a certain few,
Only for it to be played with until it breaks.
I thought I could go for some help with my issues,
But remembered the pain of loss when they leave.
My love was given...
But wasn't received.

My emotions are poked at,
They are poked at and pushed around like in a game of checkers.
They are wadded up like an imperfect suicide letter,
To be thrown away by the soon-to-be dead man.

I show my emotions to people who claim to be family,
For them to be disowned and hidden from the world.
I myself tell my emotions to hide,
To wait for me to win this game of hide and seek.
My emotions were shown...
But weren't revealed.

My loyalty was broken,
My love shattered,
My emotions hidden;
All for a simple game.

One so powerful:
It left me in a room of darkness.

One so evil:
It left me with a failed attempt of suicide.

One so clever:
I couldn't see behind the masks.

My loyalty will never bounce back,
My love will never be put together,
And my emotions will never be found.