Poetic Excuses

The Truth

You ask if I am ready to have fun,
I say I am.

You ask if I am feeling okay,
I tell you I am fine.

You say I am zoning out,
I explain that I am just being quiet.

You ask me if I want something to eat,
I decline.

You ask if I want to sit down,
I refuse.

You ask if I am having fun,
I answer positively.....
Are you having fun?

The truth is:

I was never ready to have fun,
but I tried....

When I say I am fine,
I don't want to explain.

When I am zoning out,
I am not thinking happily.

When I decline food,
I am starving myself on purpose.

I wanted to sit down so bad,
But I felt like I had to show strength.

I don't always have fun,
Today was okay....

I always say what I think you want to hear.
I don't tell you when I am in pain.
I don't explain my dreadful thoughts.

It's time I stop telling you lies,
You are my family.

So,
Above holds the truth.

It expresses what I am too weak to say in person.

If you want to talk to me about this tomorrow, please do, I can't do it myself....
I can't bring myself to say the subject out loud.

Here is the Truth.

_________________

Author's Note:

This is dedicated to one of my best friends who has always tried to make sure I have fun on this vacation... I want him to know that I have had a little bit of fun, but please, just.... talk to me about it.... lion_inferno

-Bonestorm