Doll Face (discontinued)

Doll Face [43]

~ch 42

     Change of heart~

Wes' POV

I shifted the gear from park to drive and backed out of the parking spot I was in. I didn't know whether to feel guilty or a little upset. (y/n) knew why to stay away from Kihyun but she still willingly complied to him. I was just grateful she understood why I was being so firm.

My eyes were trained on the road before shifting towards (y/n). I let out a sigh as a weight built up onto my shoulders. I felt guilty alright. I knew (y/n) still loved Kihyun but my family means more to me than their love life... My mom was working so hard to keep my sister and me in school, how's a little heartbreak more important?

And that Kihyun...how crazy does he have to be to buy a ring he knew would get rejected? The things people will do when they have the money. You barely know the girl, break her heart and then randomly propose? It just didn't make sense to me.

Hearing (y/n) shift in her seat I glance over once more. Her knees were drawn to her chest and her chin rested in the palm of her hand, with her eyes trained on whatever was out her window. My eyes ventured up to her eyes and she looked like she was on the verge of tears, both of them glazed over with tears that threatened to fall. With a sigh I focused my eyes back onto the road.

"I'm sorry... But you know why I did that right?"

"Y-Yeah." Grimaced slightly hearing her muffled voice crack slightly. It was already a sad sight to see her and her voice cracking was like the cherry on the top. Not only that but it was her first time that she ever actually displayed her emotions out about him in a non aggressive way. I guess pretending she hated him while she really loved him was tugging at her emotions, and Kihyun proposing was just her tipping point.

"Are you mad?"

"No."

"I didn't mean to be so harsh. You know my family just means a lot to me."

"I know." The more I spoke the heavier the atmosphere became. But there still questions I wanted to know even if she ended put getting annoyed and hating me.

"I know I'm in no place to ask this but why do you like even still love Kihyun?" There was a decent pause before she silently shrugged her shoulders. That's what bugged me the most (y/n) every time I or anyone else asked she would always shrug her shoulders or deny it.

"Cut the bullcrap (y/n), you have to know. Just say it' no one's going to judge you for your saying it." I knew it was harsh but someone had to be harsh with her, plus it was the only thing I could do for her and her relationship.

"I seriously don't know Wes." Her voice was small as if she was afraid I was about to yell at her.

"You can't love someone and not know why. That's not love (y/n) that's just you not knowing how to let go." I leaned back into the driver seat driving a little slower.

"You're afraid aren't you? You're afraid he's going to hurt you again... If you can't tell me why you still love him. Then tell me why did you hesitate to pull your hand away, if you can't even bring yourself to say why you still love him, then why actually think about taking his hand in marriage?" Deep down I wasn't expecting a response, sure I only sent a small amount of time with her but I knew how she was with these types of questions.

"...I still love Kihyun, I couldn't tell you why though. Maybe it is a big case of not knowing how to move on. I started the conversation between us today and I wasn't... I wasn't expecting him to do that when you pulled me away. It shocked me... Some part of wanted to say yes but the other part was telling me not to be selfish... I don't want my selfishness to be the reason why others suffer." Her voice cracked at the end and I swear I could her struggle against her tears and it almost broke my heart.