13 Reasons Why

Chapter 15

(Katie) I hear the little "click" of the tape ending, and now the only noise is my weeping. How is it that Annie could take everything I was feeling and shove it into twenty-minutes of a cassette? What did I just listen to...? Even though Annie didn't get to say her goodbye, she got to say my mind. And then that last part! How could Annie feel that nobody would die a little with her? I died a lot with Annie. So did Mia, and Hayley, and her parents, and millions of people. How was it I neglected Annie so much, and on top of that how did I possibly do it subconsciously? Through Caleb's entire tape, Annie was crying, and I was too. I bet Mia cried, and Arden, and Kenzie, and Sydney. How could you not cry hearing Annie's piece about grief and how she lost her big brother? I cried from the second she said Caleb's name. Now they're together again... I hope they are at least. I carefully raise my scarring arms and take off the headphones. In unison, my bedroom door immediately opens and closes. I whip my head back to see Brennan standing by my door. "Privacy!" I shout, attempting to wipe my eyes. Brennan sighs and walks over to my bed. "What tape are you on?" It feels like I just fell from the high beam, and all the wind vanishes from my body. The same way I felt with Mia. But... Brennan? "W-what?" I stumble over my words. "I'm on there too, you know." I move my hand over the tape-player, why is Brennan a reason? "What tape are you on?" He repeats. I swallow hard, "Four. I just finished... Caleb's." I witness Brennan's face soften, his lips curve downward and eyes get misty. "I never knew Annie's words could make me cry, you know?" Brennan whispers, burying his face in his hands. I don't nod, I just sit there. I nod on the inside, but I'm scared to move. If I do, I think I'll burst into a thousand pieces. Brennan sits down next to me on my bed. "I just want her back," he mumbles. I'm a little confused... did Annie and Brennan have some sort of connection I didn't know about? I don't question him though, I simply let myself fall apart along with Brennan. I let my head fall on his shoulders, sobbing. Because he's right, I just want her back. So, so bad.