#INSPIRE

"Help"

Let me explain.

A couple of days ago, I did an evaluation at this mental health center right next to a hospital. They basically just confirmed what I already knew, and assigned me a "program" they thought would help.

It's the all day program...so I wouldn't go to school for a few weeks.

I would have to put my phone in a basket at the front desk, do tutoring so I won't have missing work, do group therapy with people I don't know, and be so far away from anything that has ever given me any sort of comfort or certainty.

I'm really, really scared about it.

I'm a socially awkward person, so it's INSANELY hard for me to make new friends, or do social interaction at all.

I get that my parents and everyone else thinks that this'll "help" me, but all I really wanted was meds. I really don't want to leave everything behind, even just for a couple of weeks.

I'm gonna miss my friends, my enemies. Heck, I'll even miss my first ex-boyfriend!

I really don't want to go to this guys. It's only from 9-3, on Monday to Friday, and when I'm there, I'll have no homework to do when I get home!

Not to mention that they would allow us to either bring a lunch or bring money so we can buy food from the hospital cafeteria! (I hope there's a Starbucks!)

The big thing I'd miss is walking after school with my best friends, screaming All Star by Smash Mouth, and just getting away from life for a couple of hours.

That's probably the only thing that will comfort me in this scary place.

They said they'd keep me updated on everything, and that they won't totally abandon me. That's the only certainty I have in this whole situation.

I know I'll probably survive this, but I know it's not going to be comfortable at ALL.

P.S. I'm probably leaving school after this week is over. Soo live it up while you can folks!

PEACE!!~